


Opposition Research

by Mel90S



Series: Opposition Research [1]
Category: SF9 (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Politics, Asexuality, Campaign Manager Sanghyuk, Catholic Priest Seokwoo, Cults, Deputy Mayor Youngkyun, Ethical Dilemmas, Fertility Issues, Gay Sex, Incumbent Mayor Taeyang, Intern and non-filial son Chanhee, Language, Mayoral Candidate Jaeyoon, Multi, Organized Crime, Polyamorous Character, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Private Investigator Youngbin, Religious Themes, Reporter Inseong, Shady Juho, apologies to Taeyang - someone had to be antagonist, brought to you by campaign ads playing nonstop on my TV, homosexual themes, implied soulmate stuff
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-07
Updated: 2020-09-16
Packaged: 2021-03-05 22:01:26
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 18
Words: 23,947
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25772515
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Mel90S/pseuds/Mel90S
Summary: Private Investigator Kim Youngbin is hired by the mayor to dig up dirt on the man running against him next election, Lee Jaeyoon. He finds much more than he could have expected.
Relationships: Kim Youngbin/Lee Jaeyoon, Lee Jaeyoon/Original Female Character(s)
Series: Opposition Research [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2154990
Comments: 16
Kudos: 17





	1. Dirty Little Secrets

**Author's Note:**

> Written entirely for my own amusement, but I wanted to share my ideas, so enjoy and don't take anything too seriously.

“Bro!” Youngbin couldn’t help the huge grin that spread across his face at Inseong’s enthusiastic greeting as he stepped into his friend’s office at the newspaper. “You got some dirty little secrets for me?”

Youngbin just groaned and flopped himself onto the couch, “My last five customers made me sign confidentiality agreements. There’s no way you’re getting your grimy little reporter hands on my findings.”

“That’s no fun,” Inseong pouted, making himself look more like a hamster than he already did. Inseong could usually rely on Youngbin to deliver a good story. As a private investigator, he was often poking into people’s personal lives and, as a good friend, shared whatever tips seemed worthy to print.

“You could just do your own investigative journalism, Seongster, you did take that course in university. I know, ‘cause I was there.”

“That’s exactly why I didn’t learn anything in that class,” Inseong retorted with a playful grumble, “You kept distracting me with your wild imaginings of our classmates’ personal lives.”

“I’ll remind you that those stories were all at least seventy percent accurate. I was practicing my powers of observation. Any added fiction was simply because you are so cute when you are smiling and trying to suppress laughter.”

“At least I’m capable of suppressing my laughter. How many times did Professor Ahn have to reprimand you in class for disruptive behavior?”

“Touché,” Youngbin sighed, “I sure do miss those days.” The two friends had met junior year after Inseong’s year of studying abroad in London and Youngbin’s military service. In need of new companions, they latched onto each other and had been tight ever since. Even now, they shared an apartment downtown.

“I still can’t believe how long you suffered under the belief that I was gay,” Inseong snorted, “You were so insightful in parsing out everyone else’s secrets, you’re a born detective.”

“Ugh, don’t remind me,” Youngbin felt his face grow warm. Even after all this time the memory of that most awkward confession never failed to embarrass. “I let my crush on you feed my delusion. Anyway, it’s not entirely my fault either. You could have just not flirted back to me or not drawn rainbows on literally everything you got your hands on.”

“Bah hah! Just be thankful I didn’t expose my Pokémon and muscle animal drawings to any of the professors.”

“I guess you’re right,” Youngbin laughed. “Anyway, I didn’t actually come here to dredge up the embarrassing past.”

“One doesn’t need to be a detective to figure that out.” Inseong stated matter of factly. “Lunch is long over, so you didn’t come for that, and anything unimportant could have waited until we were at home.”

“Well, it’s going to be the talk of the town soon, so I wanted you to know first. I’ve just gotten a new, potentially interesting assignment.”

“Oh? So, it’s something you’re actually allowed to share with a reporter?” Inseong perked up.

“Of course, _if_ I find something worthwhile. I’ll make sure you get the scoop when whatever I find is ready to publish.”

“So…?” Inseong prompted.

“Yeah, you know Mayor Yoo?”

“Pfft, of course. Wait, don’t tell me! His fiancé suspects him of cheating.”

“No, I’m not investigating him. He hired me.”

“Oh?”

“He heard that someone is considering running against him and he wants me to get a head start on investigating him"

“Wow!” Inseong’s eyes gleamed with excitement, “So what do you know?”

“So far, just that he’s a high school music teacher, moved here with his wife from Busan three years ago. Name’s Lee Jaeyoon.”

“Does Mayor Yoo have any reason to think this Mr. Lee has something to hide?”

“Not that he shared with me. But, get this, Lee Sanghyuk is apparently running his campaign.”

“Oh wow! Now that’s a story! After everything that happened with his dad?”

Youngbin smiled, “I knew you’d like that.”

Inseong was already on his computer typing furiously.

“Are you a reporter or a gossip columnist?” Youngbin teased his friend.

“Shut up. You know I don’t publish until I have secondary confirmation. I can still write up my rough draft first. You can leave now. See you at home.”

For as social as Inseong was, he sure could block people out surprisingly fast when he was focused on a goal. Youngbin sighed and turned to leave the room. He could always tell his friend the juicier information later: just how much the mayor was paying him for this service. For now, though, he thought he might hit up the camera store for some supplies he’d been eyeing for a long time and his favorite café for a pong crush.

* * *

“Are you freaking kidding me! He’s paying you that much?”

“Plus a blank cheque for any additional expenditures.”

Inseong spluttered. “That’s why there are about twenty empty boxes of surveillance equipment in the recycling?”

Youngbin just grinned.

“Oh my God, what a sucky mayor. I hope he loses.”

“Umm”

“I mean, I hope you are extraordinarily thorough and find proof that Mr. Lee is nothing less than a bastion of uprightness.”


	2. A Model Candidate

The day could not have been more perfect, Jaeyoon thought as he emerged onto the steps of the town hall. The sun was shining brightly, and a cooling breeze kept the temperature comfortable. If only every day could be like this. The tensions of the day were falling off his shoulders.

It hadn’t been a bad day at school by any means, but there were a couple students that were worrying him, and he really hoped it was something he would be able to help them through. Those few times that he could do nothing, as a student’s life fell apart before his eyes, truly wrecked him. But he loved being a teacher for all the other times, and he really hoped that this new venture would be as rewarding as his current profession.

“Well, that’s taken care of,” Sanghyuk practically shouted as he bounded up to join Jaeyoon on the steps, “Congratulations, you’re now officially in the running for mayor.”

“God, Sanghyuk, I can’t believe I let you talk me into this,” Jaeyoon shook his head with a smile as he pulled a small notebook out of his pocket and crossed out “file campaign documents” on his to-do list. He scanned the rest of his list:

  * Buy flowers and blueberries
  * Bake cake
  * Lesson plan for Friday
  * Record J.Don collab
  * Call Mom



“Are you sure this is a good idea, Hyuk? Don’t you think you could find someone more qualified than me? I’ve never held, let alone run for, any public office.”

“Believe me, you’re just the man for the job. Upstanding citizen, adored by your students and their families, hell, you’re even best friends with a fucking priest.”

Jaeyoon groaned, “Do you mind?”

Sanghyuk ignored the protest and continued his rant. “Anyone with political experience has at least one skeleton in their closet. You know why no one has run against Mayor Yoo in the past two election cycles? He’s a mud monster. You run against him, he’s going to discover every dirty little secret you possess and turn everyone you love against you. It’s much more important to be scandal-free than to know anything about running a town. It’s not like he knows how to run a town either.” Sanghyuk grumbled. "You can learn how to be a mayor on the job."

“If you say so.” Jaeyoon laughed nervously. He was not quite as confident in himself as Sanghyuk seemed to be. He glanced back down at his notebook and quickly scribbled in ‘schedule haircut.’ His hair was starting to flop into his eyes, and there was little he hated more than that.

“Anyway, isn’t your dad in politics? You can always ask him for advice.”

“He was town clerk when I was like five, and that was only because the previous guy died in office and my dad was available to step in for a time.”

“Close enough,” Sanghyuk waved dismissively. “Enough people hate Mayor Fuckface as it is. This race will be a breeze.”

“Hyuk!” Jaeyoon gasped.

“See? Pure as the driven snow you are.”

“Well, if you are done discussing campaign strategies, I need to make a stop to get flowers and blueberries to make my blueberry cinnamon spice cake to start banking good favor with Ahrin for all the grief this race is going to put her through.”

“Solid strategy.” The campaign manager nodded with mock seriousness, “See you’re already thinking like a political animal.”

Jaeyoon rolled his eyes, “See ya, Sanghyuk.”

“Yep. Say hi to the wife for me and ask her to spare a piece of cake for me.”

“Hah! That will never happen.”

“Boo, you suck!”

Jaeyoon laughed and turned towards the shops downtown.

* * *

Jaeyoon stopped at his usual flower stall, where the lady warmly complimented him for keeping romance alive even after so many years of marriage, making him blush. He busied himself by looking at the newspaper stand nearby, while the florist assembled his bouquet of white carnations, and was shocked to see a familiar name in one of the headlines.

_Lee Sanghyuk Seeks to Topple Mayor with New Political Player_

_By Terry Kim_

_In what appears to be a continuation of his family’s feud, Lee Sanghyuk confirmed reports today that he has found a potential candidate to run against Mayor Yoo Taeyang this upcoming election cycle. Lee refused to confirm the identity of said candidate, but other sources identified him as Lee Jaeyoon, a music teacher at the local high school. We at the newspaper are looking forward to an exciting race and hope you join us for exclusive coverage right here._

Jaeyoon stared at his name. It was his first time seeing it printed in a newspaper, but he knew now it would not be the last. His stomach gave a nervous flip. Sanghyuk’s warnings earlier about the mayor played over and over in his head. What kinds of horrible things would be said about him during the race? He had to stop staring at the paper. He knew that Ahrin would want a clipping for the scrapbook, but he didn’t want to deal with these negative thoughts it provoked. He’d just pretend he hadn’t seen it.

With this mood depressor, Jaeyoon wanted nothing more than to get home as soon as possible. Ahrin could always be counted on to cheer him up and make him smile, so instead of continuing on to the market, he ducked into the café that was right in front of him. He had never visited this one before, but they had some delicious looking cakes on display. A smile lit up Jaeyoon’s face as he recognized one of his students behind the counter.

“I’ve never seen you here before, Teacher Lee,” she observed, “how can I serve you?”

“I’m looking for a cake. What do you recommend here, Hyoyeun?”

The girl smiled. “What’s the occasion?” she asked, gesturing at the flowers he was gripping tightly.

“Oh right, I guess everyone is going to know soon enough. I’m starting my campaign for mayor, so these are for my wife.”

“Wow! I would never have expected it. Does that mean you’re leaving school?” Hyoyeun questioned. “I don’t know how they’d find a replacement.”

“No,” he laughed. “I figure I can do both, at least part time, and I can reinvest the mayor salary into the music program.”

“That’s a relief.” She remarked before proceeding to describe the various cakes the café had available that day.

Jaeyoon tried to give her his complete attention, but he had a nagging feeling of being watched. A quick survey of the room did not reveal anyone looking his direction, but he still felt nervous. He ordered the white chocolate pistachio cake and sat down to wait and get a better view of the other customers. He was going to have to reprimand Sanghyuk for making him so paranoid.

Everyone seemed preoccupied with their food and beverages or the other people with them. No one looked familiar, except that one guy in the corner, but Jaeyoon couldn’t place him. If they had met before, it wouldn’t have been with Ahrin present or he would have been over for dinner. The man was busy with something on his hand phone, sucking down the drink that was sitting on the table in front of him, so Jaeyoon succumbed to his curiosity and looked at him more carefully. He had never gotten such conflicting vibes coming from one person before. The red-haired man seemed simultaneously innocent and dangerous, both cute and sexy. Surely, he would have remembered meeting someone like that. He must have just registered his presence around the neighborhood subconsciously or something. Soon enough Hyoyeun delivered Jaeyoon’s boxed cake to the table, and he was finally on his way home, putting the stranger out of his mind.


	3. Home Is Where the Heart Is

The house Jaeyoon entered was quite spacious but still managed to be very cozy. Ahrin had insisted on prioritizing space when they first started looking to move. “I need lots of room for hosting friends and acquaintances and then for whenever we start a family.” They’d been able to afford it well enough with her salary as an ED physician, and true to her word, the social butterfly kept the house full.

On Sundays, it was friends from church and/or Father Marcellinus. Wednesdays, Ahrin’s D&D group assembled, and Fridays were movie night with whomever wanted to show up. They also hosted a monthly book club and hobby club where they tried such a variety of trending hobbies from bird watching to video and board games, soap making, and even held a séance once. Jaeyoon did his part by working his way through each and every one of his students, inviting them and their families over for a meal.

That being said, Jaeyoon was not the slightest bit surprised to hear his wife talking with someone in the living room as he slid his shoes off and dropped off the cake in the kitchen.

“Please stay for dinner,” he heard her say to their guest, “Jae went absolutely wild the other day preparing a feast for the Choi family, and we need help clearing the leftovers.”

“In my defense, how was I to know that the three oldest had already gone back to university.” Jaeyoon whined as he handed Ahrin the flowers and planted a kiss on her nose. “Please join us Seokwoo, you can put away so much food in that giant body of yours.”

That earned a playful slap from the tall priest. “Hyung, please. I’m not even that much taller than you.”

Somehow Seokwoo was insecure about his height. No one else could understand this hang up. He was built like a Greek god and many a woman in his congregation mourned the day that he took the cloth despite the fact that his position gave them permission to stare at his beauty without censure.

Jaeyoon laughed and excused himself to the kitchen to reheat the leftovers. Seokwoo, who had followed him, let out a whistle of wonder as container after container was removed from the refrigerator.

“She wasn’t joking about the amount of food you made.”

“You know how I stress cook. I may have gone a little overboard.” Jaeyoon admitted sheepishly. “It’s just all this stuff about running for mayor.”

“I heard Sanghyuk was working on you. Are you gonna do it?”

“Yeah, we just filed the paperwork today after school.” Jaeyoon sighed, “I hope I didn’t make a mistake. Mayor Yoo can be ruthless when it comes to attacking his opponents. I think Sanghyuk still holds him responsible for his father’s death and that’s why he’s so determined to unseat him. I even saw an article in the newspaper today intimating such.”

“That would not surprise me in the least.” Seokwoo agreed. “He was always great at holding grudges, and that scandal really hit him hard both personally and professionally.”

“Do you think you could visit him and talk some of this stuff out? I know he’s tried to distance himself from the Church, but maybe he’d be open to talking to you as a friend.”

“I can definitely try.” Seokwoo promised as he helped Jaeyoon set the table, “But what about you? I sense that your spirit isn’t quite settled either.” Seokwoo was extraordinarily gifted at reading people, a skill that either comforted or disturbed people, depending on the situation.

Jaeyoon let out a long sigh, “It’s just that, well, before it was all hypothetical, and now it’s hitting me that I’m about to enter the public’s scrutiny. Seeing my name in the newspaper really shook me up.”

“Did it say anything negative about you?”

“Well no, but what if I said something or did something in the past that comes back to haunt me, or what if they make up outright lies about me? Sanghyuk doesn’t seem to think there’s anything too low for the mayor to try. I don’t mind so much about myself, but what if Ahrin or any of my students get hurt?”

“Those are things you just have to deal with if they arise. Unless you know of something specific that they can pin on you, there is no way to prepare in advance for the fallout. Besides, that’s one of Sanghyuk’s jobs. Despite his other faults, he is excellent at planning and problem-solving.”

“I hope you’re right.” Jaeyoon sighed.

* * *

“So Ahrin,” Seokwoo started after they had all sat down and he’d said grace, “how was work today?”

“You should have seen the maggots in this one guy’s leg wound,” her eyes sparkled, “there were even flies!”

“Oh God!” Jaeyoon blanched. “Not at the table, babe!”

“Right,” Ahrin winked at their guest. “Honey, Seokwoo’s mother is coming to visit next week. Do you think we can find some time to have her over?”

“No, no!” protested the priest, “she wanted to treat you, as a thanks for taking such good care of me. She really worried about me when I moved away from home.”

Jaeyoon laughed. “What do you tell her to make her think that we have a hard time because of you?” Really, Seokwoo’s friendship was one of the best things that had happened to him since moving to this small town. Sure, they had a ton of friends and acquaintances with Ahrin’s incessant need for serving up hospitality to everyone they met, but the two of them hit it off and quickly developed a deep affinity for each other from the moment a Father Marcellinus knocked on the door to welcome them to the community.

“It’s not like that, Hyung. She just wants to know you, meet the ones who make my life infinitely easier.” Seokwoo explained. “I should warn you though, my mother will probably ask when you’re going to have kids. I know that subject is a little…”

“Well, about that,” Jaeyoon cleared his throat, “we’re actually working on exploring some options.”

“Really?” Seokwoo raised an eyebrow.

“We’d been talking about adopting,” Ahrin explained, “but I just really want miniature Yoonies running around the place.” She laughed and pinched Jaeyoon’s cheek. “He’s too cute to let those genes go to waste.” Jaeyoon’s face turned pink.

“Who wants cake?” he asked, getting up and clearing the table.

“He’s honestly too good to me.” Ahrin sighed at Jaeyoon’s departing back. “What did I ever do to deserve him?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Posting may not be regular, I'm always afraid I'll hit a block. I am on chapter 8 right now, but I don't post until I'm confident that the earlier stuff will not need to be changed.


	4. In the Belly of the Beast

Youngkyun hated his job. Sure, he liked the salary and the stability it offered, but no one told him that being deputy mayor meant doing two jobs for the price of one.

“Hey Taeyang hyung, you got the numbers for the budget proposal in here? I want to double check everything before we have to present it at next week’s council meeting.” Youngkyun asked, poking his head into the mayor’s office.

“Sure. Think fast.” A small flash drive whizzed past, dangerously close to his head.

“Seriously?” he grumbled as he trudged over to where the device had landed.

“Hey, can you send Chanhee in here? I found something cool I wanna show him.”

“Sure thing. I’m sure I can find him somewhere around here.” Youngkyun mumbled.

He wished the mayor would take his job a little bit more seriously. The two of them had been friends since high school, and Youngkyun had admired the enthusiasm with which Taeyang started his political career. Taeyang had been full of ideas of how to improve his hometown, a little too idealistic and not very practical, but his enthusiasm was something people could rally around. That was until the excitement of the campaign was over and the mundane duties of the job kicked in. Basically, Taeyang got bored, and, after having his ideas shot down one after the other for lack of practicality, he essentially gave up trying to be what he initially wanted to be.

Youngkyun had often wondered why his friend didn’t just step down from his position, but by then the young mayor had grown accustomed to all that his new lifestyle afforded, and he always had the next election cycle to look forward to every couple years, at least until people stopped running against him.

“Thank God for this Lee Jaeyoon guy. A good fight is just what Taeyang needs right now to kick him back into shape.” Youngkyun muttered as he wandered through the building trying to find their intern. They really needed to put a tracking device on the young man.

The deputy mayor eventually found the intern predictably lying on a couch in an empty office playing some sort of mobile game. It didn’t look familiar to Youngkyun, but then when did he have time to play around on his hand phone?

“Yah Chanhee, Mayor Yoo wants to see you.”

“Oh?” Chanhee replied, eyes still glued to his screen. “What does Tae want?”

“Jeez, just how rude can you get?”

“I don’t know. Give me some time to think about it, and I’ll get back to you on that.”

Youngkyun knew that the intern did not want to be there. He had no interest in politics or government, but his father, whom he despised, really wanted him to be and had donated considerable funds to Taeyang’s office to get Chanhee the internship there. If it had been any other government office, the young man would have had his way and been kicked out with a strongly worded letter sent to his father about how unsuited he was for this career path, but Taeyang didn’t care what he did, and Youngkyun was too busy trying to do everyone’s jobs to do anything about it.  


“I don’t have time for this shit, Chanhee. Taeyang just said he found something interesting to show you.”

“I bet it’s another stupid cat video,” Chanhee grumbled as he took probably twenty minutes to get off the couch. Youngkyun didn’t actually stay to time the intern, he just assumed and went back to work.

Back in his office, Youngkyun plugged in the flash drive and got to work, jotting down discrepancies and questions to clarify with the boss. He had all sorts of notes from past meetings about what they should and should not spend money on, and he needed to make sure everything had been appropriately covered in their final presentation. Finally done, two hours later, he made his way back to the mayor’s office, taking a detour to fix himself an iced Americano.

As expected, very little useful work was happening in the office.

“Are you… dancing?” Youngkyun stared at the mayor and intern in disbelief.

Taeyang quickly turned off the music and took his seat.

“You haven’t been doing this the entire time have you?” asked Youngkyun in a disapproving tone. “You can leave, Chanhee.”

With the intern gone, Youngkyun took a seat across from his friend. “We have some numbers to discuss.”

“Can’t it wait until tomorrow?” Taeyang pouted. “It’s almost time to go home anyway.”

“Maybe some of this can wait but let me ask just this one question first. What account are you using to pay that PI Kim Youngbin?”

Taeyang’s eyes grew wide. “Fffffffuuuuuuuck”

“That’s what I thought.” Youngkyun sighed.

The mayor shuffled through his desk, found a check and dropped it into the shredder. “Where would I be without you?”

“Definitely in jail or at least run out of town.” Youngkyun said confidently. “Also, you might want to transfer either the budget or the blackmail to a different flash drive than this one,” he advised tossing it back on Taeyang’s desk.

“Oh right, I forgot that was on there.” Taeyang picked it up and plugged it in. “Did you like the PowerPoint though?”

“It was… something.” Youngkyun acknowledged. “Now if you’d spend as much attention to the job as you spend adding special effects to your presentations…”

“If my job was half as fun as PowerPoint, then it wouldn’t be a problem.”

“You do know there are jobs out there for people who like that kind of stuff, right?” Youngkyun asked.

“Sure, but it’s kinda late for that now.” Taeyang sighed. “I should probably have talked to the career adviser back in high school.”

“Plenty people change careers.”

“But that is like admitting I made a mistake. I can’t do that.”

“You’d seriously rather be miserable?”

“It’s not so bad.”

“Yeah, because I end up doing most of your work.” Youngkyun acknowledged. “Hyung, I can’t keep doing this either. I’m nearly burnt out, and I’m not even thirty yet. I honestly haven’t decided yet if I want to serve another term with you.”

“But I need you!”

“I know. That’s why it’s so hard.” He sighed, “I love you man, I just, I have to take care of myself too.” Youngkyun left to go pack up for the day. There wasn’t much point in sticking around much longer, if the mayor was calling it a day. He was already looking forward to spending the rest of the evening with his couch, cat, a drink or more, and job websites.


	5. On the Hunt

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Apologies to anyone confused by my changing the rating on this story a few times. Who knows what it's going to be by the end of this. I sure don't. I apparently can only write comic relief or heavy angst, and there's nothing in between.

Youngbin was sitting at his kitchen table organizing his notes and inputting the data into his computer. He was really loving the new surveillance tech he’d been able to purchase, thanks to the mayor’s generosity. Now that he had established Jaeyoon’s regular routine, he could let the program’s algorithm, in coordination with the trackers he’d placed on the couple’s cars and bicycles, do all the work, notifying him whenever they strayed from their normal pattern of behavior.

“Oh, you’re here!” Inseong sounded surprised as he entered the apartment. “I haven’t seen you in like a month? Are you done stalking your boy?”

“S’not my boy,” Youngbin muttered, focusing on his task.

“That’s not how you sounded the first time you saw him in real life. ‘He’s tall, Inseong, with these deep deep dimples, and that ass…’” Inseong teased, “but seriously, what are you up to now?”

Youngbin proudly showed off his toys to his best friend. “So, you see, right now they’re at home for D&D, and I can put in their other regular activities like movie night on Fridays.”

“Not this Friday,” Inseong commented.

“Huh?” Youngbin turned to look at him. “What do you mean?”

Inseong smiled smugly, “Oh, just that he’s officially kicking off his campaign at the high school gym Friday evening. Sanghyuk notified the newspaper, so I’ve got a press pass. Do you want to be my plus one?”

Youngbin paused to consider the offer. Being right there in that room would definitely get him a better perspective, but was it a good idea to be seen in public so close to the subject of his investigation?

Inseong seemed to understand his hesitation. “He’s already noticed you once, and from that video you took on your phone, he stared at you for an almost inappropriately long time.” He reasoned, “it’s probably better for him to see you out in the open than lurking in the shadows, less suspicious. Though, for the life of me, I don’t understand why you thought red hair was a good idea with your job.”

“I look hot.” Youngbin pouted, “besides, I always wear a beanie or snapback when I’m on someone’s tail.”

“Okay Narcissus,” Inseong laughed. “I’m getting chicken and beer. You wanna place an order?”

“Sure, I even have a voucher we can use.”

* * *

The next morning found Youngbin in a bookstore watching the building across the street that Jaeyoon had entered nearly twenty minutes before. Usually Jaeyoon spent his Thursday mornings at the gym before going into school for afternoon band and choir practices.

When he got the alert, Youngbin wasn’t so much surprised by the divergence from the schedule as he was by seeing Jaeyoon visiting an OB/GYN by himself. His wife was nowhere to be seen, and Youngbin’s app confirmed that her car was still parked at the hospital where she worked. _Finally_ , a mystery to unravel. In all likelihood it was just an affair, but those were boring for a PI like himself who was always getting hired by suspicious spouses, so he personally hoped there could be a more exciting reason for this behavior.

Eventually, some movement across the street caught his eye, so Youngbin quickly lifted his camera and snapped several photos of Jaeyoon exiting the building, _still alone_ , he noted. He folded up the papers he was holding and stuffed them in his back pocket before climbing into his car and driving off.

Youngbin opted to stick around, long after Jaeyoon had departed, monitoring the building to see if any more secrets might reveal themselves, diligently photographing every person that entered and exited the building. He was pleased to see how well his tech worked, as he watched his app track the man’s subsequent trip to the gym, then home, and finally the school. The stakeout was incredibly long and boring, and Youngbin had never been happier to get home and join Inseong for a night of karaoke and clubbing.

* * *

“Just because something is expensive doesn’t mean it looks good.” Youngbin tried explaining to Inseong as they were getting ready for the campaign launch.

“But if people see me wearing this, they’ll think I’m rich and be more attracted to me.”

“See, this attitude is exactly the reason why these labels are able to get away with producing things that are ugly as shit.” Youngbin complained while rummaging through Inseong’s closet. “Do you seriously not own a single normal suit?” He tossed a Prussian blue floral suit onto the bed, “Just wear this one. It’s not quite as ostentatious as the rest.”

Inseong complied, and the two made their way to the event. Even if his friend stuck out like a sore thumb, Youngbin felt confident in his own appearance and ability to go home with someone who was not Inseong. It didn’t have to be all work tonight.

The event started with several people, including the high school principle, Lee Sanghyuk, and some priest who claimed to be Jaeyoon’s best friend giving moving speeches extolling his virtues.

“It’s like they’re asking for it.” Youngbin whispered quietly in Inseong’s ear. Inseong didn’t need to ask for clarification. As a reporter he knew that the cleaner someone tries to appear, the more devastating the tiniest scandal can be. The man himself seemed to understand this, because, when he appeared with his wife on his arm, he started off by begging everyone not to believe everything his friends had said, because _they were all just trying to be nice_.

Youngbin didn’t pay much attention to what else was said, since he was busy trying to evaluate the body language the candidate and doctor were exhibiting towards each other. Inseong could always fill him in on the actual content later. Lee Jaeyoon seemed confident and humble, joking easily and smiling broadly. His wife, Dr. Han, seemed very comfortable in the spotlight, adding comments here and there that made everyone laugh and her husband to smile fondly at her. At no point in the night did Jaeyoon lose physical contact with his wife, Youngbin noted with interest. He was always holding her hand or arm, rubbing her shoulder, or wrapping an arm around her waist. He even kissed the top of her head a couple times while she was talking animatedly with someone in the crowd during the reception. Youngbin found himself wondering, for the first time in his life, how it would feel to be that short with such a tall handsome man.

Left in the dust by his extroverted friend and honestly getting a little bored, he figured it was high time to do his own hunting. Surely in this crowd there would be at least one person interested in taking him home, but despite his best efforts no one seemed to be picking up what he was putting out. The food there was excellent at least. It seemed like nearly everyone there was acquainted with each other already, and several people came up to Youngbin to ask how he knew Jaeyoon out of simple curiosity and no evident desire to get laid. He was getting slightly tired of having to point out Inseong and explain that he came with his newspaper friend.

Youngbin was about to step outside for a smoke when he felt a hand on his arm.

“Wait, I noticed you earlier and hoped we could get to know each other.”

He turned to see Dr. Han with Jaeyoon right behind her.

“I don’t recall ever seeing you before today,” she continued, “but Jaeyoon seemed to think there was something familiar about you. May I ask your name?”

Youngbin was momentarily stunned. He hadn’t expected to be sought out like this. Dr. Han stood waiting for his answer expectantly, and Jaeyoon was… well, Youngbin had seen that look before. He smiled and licked his lips, briefly enjoying the panic in the other man’s eyes before turning back to answer the lady.

“Youngbin, Kim Youngbin,” he bowed his head in greeting.

“Nice to meet you,” she smiled. “I guess you know who we are: Ahrin and Jaeyoon. It’s strange to think that more people will know us than we them.” She laughed, “That’s gonna take some getting used to. So, what do you do?”

“I’m a dancer.” It wasn’t a lie. Youngbin did some dancing on the side, more of a hobby than anything, but it was something he enjoyed and could use to supplement his income when business was slow.

“Oh, wow! Finally someone with an interesting career!" She laughed. "Jaeyoon teaches music here at the school, so it's always nice to meet other artistic people."

Youngbin smiled and nodded, pretending he didn't already know everything about Jaeyoon and Dr. Han's careers.

"I really wish we had more time to chat, but there are a lot of people still to greet.” She actually sounded regretful, “We love meeting and getting to know new people. Would you be interested in coming over Monday night? We usually have a good group of friends over to eat and hang out, probably play some tabletop games.” She handed Youngbin her business card, “Just text me, if you decide to join us, and I’ll send you our address.”

Youngbin glanced back up at Jaeyoon, who seemed busy counting his wife’s hairs, and smiled. _This could be interesting,_ he thought. He turned his attention back to the little lady, “Thank you, I think I might just take you up on that.”


	6. Honey Potting

Inseong nearly choked on his water when Youngbin emerged from his room. “W-why?”

“Gut feeling.” Youngbin smirked.

“I thought you knew not to trust your gaydar, Binnie. He’s married, and, in the short amount of time I saw them together, they did an unbelievable amount of PDA, and that’s saying something coming from me.”

“Well, he definitely checked me out.”

“Pfft, anyone can do that. A man doesn’t have to be gay to appreciate how hot you are.” Inseong dragged his gaze up and down the PI’s body, taking in the dark wash skinny jeans and loose black v-neck t-shirt that showed off a bit of his tattoo that teased a promise of more secrets to be revealed. The reporter didn’t stop until he had successfully managed to turn his friend’s face as red as his hair.

“I hate you.” Youngbin grumbled.

“Go get ‘em tiger,” Inseong slapped his butt. “Go wreck that marriage for a fat paycheck.”

“You’re unbelievable.” Youngbin grabbed his motorcycle jacket off the couch, “Don’t wait up.”

The twenty-minute drive to the Lee house gave Youngbin some time to pull himself back together. He didn’t know why he felt so nervous. He wasn’t actually going to try to ruin this couple’s marriage; he was just going to apply a little pressure here or there to find what cracks could be exploited.

The front door was wide open, and light and laughter spilled out into the front yard. “Hello?” Youngbin announced his presence as he removed his shoes by the door.

“Ah, Mr. Kim!” The petite hostess pulled herself away from some other guests, “I’m so glad you were able to join us!”

“Thank you for inviting me Dr. Han.” He bowed respectfully and handed over the bottle of wine he had brought.

“Please call me Ahrin,” she replied with a laugh, “and it’s no trouble at all. Jaeyoon made way more food than he usually does for these get togethers. Honey, Mr. Kim is here!” she called back into the house.

Jaeyoon peeked around the corner and gave a quick nod in their direction before disappearing back into the kitchen with an “Excuse me, I’m really busy right now,” in the tiniest voice Youngbin had ever heard. Any doubts he had held regarding his suspicions were fading rapidly. The man truly looked good enough to eat in his white collared shirt with the sleeves rolled up past his elbows and the pastel pink apron tied around his slim waist.

“Ahrin, you are really going to have to return the favor of calling me Youngbin,” he said shrugging off his jacket. “Do you think he could use some help in there?”

“Probably.”

“No!” came an exclamation from the kitchen, “I’m basically done. Introduce him to everyone else, babe.”

Ahrin laughed and gestured Youngbin towards the living room. “He can get a bit shy from time to time,” she explained, “I guess that’s why we’re such a good match, opposites attracting and all that.”

 _I’m sure that’s all that’s going on here_ , Youngbin thought ruefully. He honestly couldn’t help liking the little doctor. Her cheerfulness and enthusiasm for meeting and befriending strangers kinda reminded him of Inseong. For the first time, he started regretting taking this job. _Well,_ he rationalized, _it’s always possible that the music teacher doesn’t have any skeletons in his closet._

Youngbin quickly felt welcomed into the couple’s friend group, and the spread of snacks and beverages Jaeyoon laid out was truly impressive.

“I married him for his cooking,” Ahrin joked, “he makes the best blueberry spice cake.”

“How did you two meet?” Youngbin asked, not having to fake his curiosity.

“Her family moved next door when I was twelve.” Jaeyoon replied, still managing to avoid eye contact as he dealt out the cards.

“I pulled him out of his shell,” Ahrin laughed, “we got into so much trouble. Our teachers had no idea what to make of his transformation after that first summer.”

“Is that so?” the PI hummed thoughtfully.

“Ahrin told us you were a dancer,” Mrs. Park turned to Youngbin, “What do you do with that? My son has been talking about trying out to become an idol ever since Jaeyoon helped him discover his voice.”

“Yes, I’ve been lucky enough to find jobs as back-up dancer and have even tried my hand at choreography with some friends of mine in the industry.”

“I told Jaeyoon he should try to recruit him to help with the school musical, since they don’t have a dance teacher.” Ahrin helpfully informed everybody.

“I can dance just fine.” Jaeyoon pouted, _quite cutely_ , Youngbin’s mind supplied.

“Sure honey, you can patch together something from your vast repertoire of girl group dances,”

Youngbin choked and Jaeyoon turned an adorable shade of pink.

“But wouldn’t it be nice if your kids had something original to perform?” Ahrin finished.

Youngbin could not let this opportunity slide past. “I’d love to collaborate on a project like that.”

The rest of the evening passed enjoyably enough, and Youngbin took the opportunity to slide over next to his target when Mrs. Park vacated her seat at one point in the night. Jaeyoon was clearly a lightweight when it came to alcohol consumption, and Youngbin stayed busy making sure his glass never fell below half empty.

The younger man was laughing a little too hard at Youngbin’s description of one of his and Inseong’s university escapades when the PI saw his chance to test the waters and let his hand rest on the other’s thigh. Unfortunately, Jaeyoon was not as inhibited as Youngbin had assumed, because the man tensed up and abruptly asked his guests to excuse him as he was suddenly not feeling well.

“Oh dear,” Ahrin said in a worried tone, “I hope he’s okay. He has hardly been sick a day in his life since I’ve known him.”

“I can go check on him.” Youngbin heard himself volunteering before he’d even had time to think it through and realize what a bad idea it was.

“Oh, would you?” I’d hate to leave everyone here in a lurch.”

“Absolutely, leave him to me.” Youngbin assured her and went off in the direction Jaeyoon had disappeared.

He finally found him sitting on a bed holding a box with various photographs and what appeared to be handwritten letters strewn about.

“Jaeyoon?”

The other startled and began packing everything back in the box. “I don’t know what you’re trying to do here, but I’m fine. We’re happy, and… and I really don’t need someone like you coming in and creating confusion.”

“What do you mean ‘someone like me’?” Youngbin asked softly, walking over to stand directly in front of the younger man. He knelt down to make eye contact with Jaeyoon’s lowered gaze. “Do I make you confused?”

“Ye…, no. No!”

Youngbin’s mouth twitched upwards into a smile at the panicked expression in Jaeyoon’s eyes, “Are you sure?”

“I… I…” Those eyes were now locked on every movement of Youngbin’s lips. A tense silence dragged out as the two stared at each other, unmoving, until the man choked out a strangled, “please.”

Youngbin’s body sprang into action, lips seeking out the other man’s, who, despite all verbal hesitation, responded in a way that could only be described as ‘hungrily.’

The two fell backwards onto the bed. Every place Youngbin touched managed to elicit a moan. He could feel some very defined chest and abdominal muscles, but the younger man would not let go of his face so that he could admire the view. Instead he settled on fumbling blindly with the buttons while ravaging his mouth.

Youngbin had nearly managed to free him from his shirt when a wetness on his cheek gave him pause.

“Shit” he startled at the sight of the man underneath him with tears streaming down his face, “shit, shit, shit. I uhh…,” Youngbin stammered, unsure how to proceed.

He pulled Jaeyoon back up to a sitting position and rubbed his back, while the other continued sobbing into his hands. They sat like that together quietly until Jaeyoon had calmed down a bit.

“Hey, I’ll be right back,” Youngbin promised softly. Jaeyoon nodded and hiccuped.

Youngbin made his way back through the house. This was not at all how he had anticipated the evening to go, and he had imagined so many different scenarios.

He found Ahrin in the kitchen clearing up the dishes. There was no sign of the other guests.

“Is he okay?” she asked.

“I’m not sure,” Youngbin answered honestly, “he seems pretty upset, and I’m afraid I wasn’t much help. I came out to get him a glass of water.”

“Ah,” she nodded, dried her hands on a towel, and pulled a tin out of the cupboard. “Here fix him some of this tea, and I’ll go check on him.”

Youngbin could hardly believe the situation he was in, but he obediently filled the kettle and turned on the stove. Inseong would absolutely eat up this story, but everything about it felt somehow personal. _Oh God,_ was he developing _feelings_ for this man? He was obviously very physically attractive. Youngbin was really going to have to be careful not to let him get under his skin. After all, he had a job to do. He dumped what seemed like an appropriate amount of tea into the pot of hot water and carefully carried it back to the bedroom.

Jaeyoon was now in pajamas and tucked under the covers. Ahrin sat beside him, holding his hand and brushing the hair out of his teary eyes.

“Thank you, Youngbin.” She said as he set up the tray beside the bed.

Youngbin bowed his head, “I’ll take my leave then. Thank you for your hospitality, and… and I’m truly sorry.”


	7. Revise the Plan

On Tuesday, Youngbin woke with a splitting headache and the afternoon sun blinding his eyes. He groaned, turned over, and buried his face into his pillow. It was too much work to get up and pull the shades. The front door clicked open and shut, and soon enough Inseong was sitting on his bed.

“Binnie,” he lightly shook his shoulders, “it’s half past one, you’re worrying me. What happened?”

Youngbin stared at his friend blearily.

“You came home last night, dragged me to the pocha, and got totally wasted.” Inseong prompted.

Youngbin groaned. “I fucked up.”

“Yeah, you already told me that. In fact, that was the only thing you said last night other than ordering more soju.”

“Wait,” Younbin squinted at his friend, “why are you here in the middle of the day?”

“Lunch break. You kinda freaked me out last night, so I wanted to check on you.” Inseong got up and closed the window shades. “Now spill.”

“I made him cry.” Youngbin sighed. “We were making out, and the next thing I know, he’s bawling his eyes out.”

“Hold up,” Inseong interrupted, “you’re talking about Lee Jaeyoon?”

Youngbin nodded slowly, his head pounding heavily. He grabbed the bottle of aspirin he always kept nearby and downed a couple.

“Wow, you move fast! This means you’ve got him, right?”

“It’s not that easy,” Youngbin sighed for the millionth time. “I’ve been with my share of closeted gays before, but he seemed to be in some serious distress. I don’t know, Inseong, it just feels like a really low blow to take advantage of that.”

“The mayor wouldn’t care.”

“I know. That’s exactly why we can’t let any of this get out until I can sort this out for myself.” He cast a pleading look at the reporter. “Maybe I can find evidence that he is harboring some secret anti-gay agenda in his platform or emotionally abusing his wife in the process of hiding his sexuality or something like that, then I wouldn’t feel guilty about outing him to the general public.”

“You’ve got it,” Inseong assured him. “I won’t write a word until you give me the green light.” He gave his hungover friend a couple pats before standing up. “I’ve got to get some food and run back to the office though. Text if you need anything.”

Youngbin nodded and rolled back over before deciding he probably shouldn’t mope the day away, and he really needed a shower. The hot water, and probably the aspirin, helped clear some of the cobwebs in his mind. This Jaeyoon was turning into more of a mystery than he’d expected what with the OB/GYN visit combined with the new revelation of his apparent sexuality. He could kick himself for ruining his chance to get to know the couple. Unless Ahrin was incredibly dense, he surely wouldn’t be allowed to interact socially with them anymore and would have to go back to surveilling from a distance. He was really going to have to regroup and figure out how to disappear back into the shadows after all that had passed.

Youngbin sighed and turned off the water only to hear his phone ringing in the bedroom. He hurried out, but wasn’t able to pick it up before it stopped ringing. The number was unfamiliar, so he decided not to worry about it and just got dressed and made his way to the kitchen to fix some instant noodles.

He was busy researching the clinic, trying to parse out any possible rationale for Jaeyoon’s mysterious visit the previous week when Inseong finally got home around 5:30. “You’re looking better,” he remarked, “you figure out what you’re going to do next?”

“Working on it. I need to pick up some hair dye first, I think.” The red hair definitely was not going to work for him anymore. Black or brown hair should help disguise his appearance, especially since Jaeyoon had only ever seen him with the red.

“Good, let’s get meat.” Inseong threw Youngbin’s jacket at his face and strode back out the door. Youngbin grabbed his phone and wallet and ran to catch up with his friend.

* * *

No one was better than Inseong for helping forget one’s problems and Youngbin was going to have to search the floor of the restaurant to try to find the belly button he was sure he’d lost during one of Inseong’s over-the-top stories from the office.

“What time is it?” he wheezed, trying to recover from the onslaught of hysteria. Pulling out his phone, he noticed for the first time that the caller from earlier today had left a voice message. Curious, he pressed play:

_Hello Mr. Kim. I hope you don’t mind me reaching out like this. Lee Jaeyoon gave me your number. I am the principal at his school, Moon Tae-Sang. I would love to be able to discuss the possibility of working together to develop a dance club in our arts department. Mr. Lee mentioned that you had expressed some degree of interest in the matter, so I would love to get your thoughts. Give my office a call at your earliest convenience, and my secretary can set up a meeting. Thank you, and I hope to hear from you soon.”_

Youngbin stared at his phone and the number blinking across the screen.

“What was that?” Inseong pressed when it became evident that Youngbin wasn’t immediately talking.

“I guess we don’t need to stop for hair dye tonight. Jaeyoon is going to keep me in his life.”

Inseong whistled. “Well damn! You ready to have an affair with a married man?”

“It’s just a job!”

“But you obviously want him.” Inseong helpfully pointed out.

“It’s not like that!” Younbin protested. “It’s just fun to watch him get flustered.”

Inseong nodded his head understandingly. “Sure,” he agreed, “it’s great fun until your best friend is pouring his heart out about how much he’s in love with you.”

Youngbin’s eyes grew wide and his mouth opened and closed several times, unable to produce a response to his friend’s revelation.

“I was just a kid, a student of human behavior.” Inseong made puppy eyes to accompany his apology.

“You are absolutely unbelievable, Kim Inseong.” Youngbin threw a wad of cash on the table and stomped out of the restaurant. Inseong’s confession really pissed him off. To think that he’d led him on like that on purpose way back then? Obviously, he’d forgive him in a day or two. One doesn’t throw away so many years of best friendship for just anything, but he needed to let off some steam, and he had a right to be angry for a bit.

As much as he wanted to stew over the betrayal from their university days, he kept coming back to the point Inseong had made about the similarities to his situation with Jaeyoon. Why was this even bothering him? It’s a job, not a relationship! Was it possible that Inseong right, and he was getting too emotionally invested in Jaeyoon? What was he thinking, that there’d be some possibility of a relationship after all of this ended? That would clearly be an insane hope. _I am the predator; he is the prey._ Youngbin reminded himself. He would just do whatever it took to complete his task and quit deluding himself into thinking there was anything more to it than that.


	8. Let's Try Being Professional

Jaeyoon was dreading seeing Youngbin again. He hated his own weakness that had caused him to lower his guard and embarrass himself in front of the other. Ahrin was right though. He shouldn’t let his personal discomfort take away such a good opportunity for his students. He knew there were plenty of kids in the school interested in dance whose parents couldn’t afford lessons, and it was true, he really could use the help for the musical, especially since he was trying to run a campaign at the same time. He would just have to be a professional and treat the unbearably attractive man like any of his other colleagues.

Jaeyoon was using his free period to grade his students’ essays about the aspects of music used to convey different types of emotion when Principal Moon entered with Youngbin close behind.

“Oh good!” the principal exclaimed, “you’re not busy.”

Jaeyoon gave the man a look of incredulity. How could he not see the huge stack of papers in front of him? Youngbin giggled infectiously, pulling an unbidden smile from Jaeyoon’s lips.

“I have a meeting to attend,” the principal continued obliviously, “You don’t mind showing Mr. Kim around the campus? He won’t need a whole office with one day a week classes, so I figured you could give him one of the drawers in your filing cabinet.”

“Yes sir.” Jaeyoon bowed, inwardly cursing his luck as the principal left. Of course, he would think the two of them were on the best of terms, he had talked up the dancer to his boss for the sake of the students. “If you don’t mind waiting a few minutes, Mr. Kim, I’d really like to finish grading this one paper.” Jaeyoon returned to his desk to resume his interrupted work.

“Hyung.”

“Excuse me?” he looked up confused. He was fairly certain Youngbin was older than him. The other man walked slowly over and took a seat on the edge of his desk, sliding the stack of papers over and taking the grading pen from Jaeyoon’s grasp.

“Don’t you think you should call me hyung?” Youngbin slipped the pen into his mouth, maintaining eye contact the entire time, “I mean, after the other night at your house…”

Jaeyoon grabbed a new pen from his desk drawer and turned his attention back to the essay. “Maybe outside of school it would be appropriate, but this is a professional workplace. You can sit over there, Mr. Kim.” He pointed at the rows of student desks.

Was this really how Youngbin was going to play it? Jaeyoon felt sick. He tried focusing on his work, but his thoughts were racing. Why did this man feel the need to torment him? He’d been nothing but kind, hosting him at their house and helping him get a job at the school. The man had even seen him at his most vulnerable. Did he think it was a joke? Honestly, he was starting to get pissed off. He sighed heavily and slapped a sticky note on the essay he was grading to remind himself where he had left off.

“Come on,” Jaeyoon got up and headed for the door, “let’s get this tour out of the way.”

Youngbin quickly got up to follow. _What was with him?_ This icy demeanor was a far cry from the blushing and stammering Jaeyoon had exhibited at his home. Was it just this public setting or was something else going on? This was actually a bit of an exciting development. How many different sides of Lee Jaeyoon could he unlock? He hurried to catch up with the man. As shameless as he was, he didn’t want to be caught staring at the other’s backside.

The tour was actually very educational. Jaeyoon taught him how to read the hygrometer and adjust the humidifier in the band room to protect the instruments that were stored there, how to operate the stereo in the choir room that would double as his dance studio on Friday afternoons, and, most importantly, how to refill and operate the coffee machine in the faculty lounge. “It must never be empty,” Jaeyoon said seriously, “You do not want to see some of our colleagues without a cup in their hands.”

Throughout it all, Youngbin tried every trick in his arsenal to get a rise out of the younger man. He found several opportunities to initiate physical contact, but Jaeyoon neither allowed it to continue nor withdrew from him in any manner that might imply that he had even noticed the intrusion. He continued working on the pen and managed to turn nearly everything he said into an innuendo, but every attempt was steadfastly ignored. Youngbin knew he should probably take the hint and leave the man alone, but, with every non-response, his competitiveness only grew.

“This is about all of it,” Jaeyoon said, wrapping up the tour behind the stage at one end of the gym that doubled as the auditorium, “Do you have any questions?”

Youngbin shook his head, regretful over his lack of success.

“Then I have a question for you.” Jaeyoon took a hold of his arm and pulled him off to the side against the wall. He leaned down close to Youngbin’s ear. “What exactly are you doing here?” he hissed, snatching back his pen from the slackened mouth of the other. “Are you here to teach or to mess around?”

Youngbin stared straight into his eyes, mere centimeters from his own. He hadn’t noticed how hot and stuffy this back room was. Jaeyoon’s grip on his bicep tightened and so did his chest.

“Both?” Youngbin heard himself say. “Can’t it be both?”

Jaeyoon moved impossibly closer, effectively trapping him against the wall. “That’s not a good idea,” he said in a low voice. “You don’t know what you’re asking,” Jaeyoon trailed off, staring past his head at the wall.

“Then tell me,” Youngbin countered. “What would happen? Is it your job? Family? Friends? Wife?”

“Leave Ahrin out of this,” Jaeyoon practically growled. “She’s the best thing that ever happened to me.” He finally took a couple steps back and wrapped his arms around himself. “You wouldn’t understand, hyung,” he sighed.

Youngbin’s heart clenched. He stepped forward and pulled the younger man into a hug. It took a moment, but Jaeyoon eventually melted into his touch.

“I _had_ been meaning to thank you,” Jaeyoon said softly, “for stopping the other night before things went too far. I… I really don’t think I could have asked you to stop, while I was in that state, but you did. That’s why I thought I could trust you.” He sighed, “I guess I was wrong.”

A wave of guilt swept over Youngbin at those words. _Ugh, this damn conscience._

Jaeyoon pulled himself out of his arms and gave him a serious look, “I really think we can do some great things together. But, hyung, you really need to learn some boundaries.”

“I reckon you’re right,” Youngbin chuckled. “I will work on it, I promise.” Impulsively, he dropped a quick kiss on Jaeyoon’s cheek. “I’ll leave first.”

He retraced their steps, hoping he wouldn’t get lost finding his way back out of the school. It was really incredible how he kept completely messing up yet still kept receiving second chances. If he was to maintain some sort of relationship with his mark, he would need to watch his steps much more carefully moving forward.


	9. Boundaries

Youngbin had appointed Inseong to be his official chaperone for any outside of school activities involving Jaeyoon, and that was why the man was currently sitting on Jaeyoon’s couch regaling the high school English and history teachers with stories of his year in London, while Miss Jung’s fiancé glared at him suspiciously from the corner. This assemblage was Ahrin’s idea for helping Youngbin meet and become comfortable with all of his new colleagues, since he only spent one afternoon a week at the school and didn’t have many opportunities to get to know them.

Inseong had found it hilarious that Youngbin required his presence for this event. “Isn’t his wife enough of a deterrent for you?”

“I need to establish a pattern of always having you around. Plus, you can have my back, when I go snooping around the house.”

The idea of going undercover delighted Inseong, who decided to be an aspiring novelist and flirted with the idea of pretending to be Youngbin’s boyfriend until he saw the ladies and decided he’d rather flirt with them.

Youngbin confirmed that both Jaeyoon and Ahrin were occupied with other guests and gave his friend a quick nod. Time to investigate. Inseong flashed an OK sign from behind Miss Jung to verify he got the message. He was supposed to text Youngbin if anyone started looking for him or heading to the other parts of the house, but Youngbin knew better than to rely too heavily on this signaling method. He set a twenty-minute timer on his phone to ensure that he wouldn’t lose track of time and headed off in the direction of the bedroom.

His main target was that box he’d seen Jaeyoon with that first night, because of how personal it seemed to be. This was the advantage that being a PI had over police detectives, tied down by warrant requirements and other pesky laws. As long as his client did not take legal action against his target, it didn’t matter what means he used to obtain information.

Youngbin was surprised how easy it was to find the box. It was just sitting there in a drawer surrounded by Jaeyoon’s socks. He removed the contents and photographed each piece, careful to maintain the order in which he found them. He recognized Jaeyoon and Ahrin in some of the pictures. They were very young, in high school maybe, but there weren’t any dates on the pictures to confirm. There were also many pictures of another boy, solo, with Jaeyoon, and of all three of them together, laughing and smiling.

Youngbin quickly finished the job with practiced speed and returned to the box to the drawer, moving on to continue his search for anything else of interest. He found five years’ worth of tax statements, the deed to the house, birth certificates, and other important documents in a fire safe in the closet that had the key in the lock. The computer in the office was unfortunately fingerprint protected, so he’d have to come up with an alternative plan for that. He was going through the stacks of papers in and on the desk photographing everything without bothering to check contents when his phone’s alarm went off. He quickly put everything back as he’d found it and made his way back towards the living room.

Inseong met him in the hall and pushed him out the front door. “Light up,” he shoved a cigarette and lighter into his hands, “I told them you’d gone out for a smoke.”

“Seong!” Youngbin exclaimed, fumbling with the lighter, “why the hell would you say something like that?” He took a long drag of the cigarette. “Never make up a complicated lie when a simpler one will do.”

“I figured no one would go looking for you that way.” Inseong explained.

“Or you’d find the other smokers in the school who would be suddenly reminded how long it’s been since their last smoke and come out to join me.”

“Oh,” Inseong grimaced, “Sorry, I didn’t think of that”

“It’s okay, I kinda need it now. You give me too much anxiety.” Youngbin took a few more minutes to let his racing heart calm down. “Okay, let’s go in,” he snuffed out the cigarette, “I probably smell smokey enough.”

“Found him!” Inseong loudly announced as they walked back in together. Youngbin silently groaned. He’d have to give his friend a master class in lying and deceit, if he was going to be a participant in this investigation.

The whole evening ended up being very helpful for breaking the ice with his new colleagues, and Youngbin made sure to express his thankfulness to the hostess for her thoughtfulness in putting it together for him.

“Honestly,” Ahrin responded, “I think it will be really nice to have you around, and I hope that you and Jaeyoon might become good friends. I mean, he has Seokwoo, but there’s only so much fun a priest is allowed to have, if you know what I mean.”

“What the fuck did she mean by that?” Youngbin asked Inseong later that night after they’d returned home laden down with leftover food from the party.

Inseong shrugged and grabbed a cupcake out of the box he’d just set down. “It sounded like she wanted you to fuck her husband.”

Youngbin blinked. “You’re insane. Why would you say that?”

“It’s something a priest wouldn’t be allowed to do.” Inseong took a big bite of the cupcake and moaned loudly.

“Surely there are other things priests aren’t allowed to do, right?” Youngbin made a mental note to do some research on the subject. His choirboy days were long gone, and it had been years since he’d stepped foot in a church building let alone thought about the teachings of the Catholic Church. “And why are you eating now?”

“I didn’t have time to eat. Too busy talking.”

“You didn’t give me any unsanctioned cover stories that I’ll have to back up at school, did you?” Youngbin eyed his friend suspiciously.

“Course not,” he said around the cupcake in his mouth. “I swear!” he insisted.

“You’d better not have.” Youngbin laughed. “If I have to answer questions about some fictional African safari next week, I know who to blame.”

* * *

Love letters. That’s what was in the box in Jaeyoon’s sock drawer, and none of them were from Ahrin. The man must not have been quite as closeted as Youngbin had presumed, if he’d had a boyfriend back in high school. It must have been pretty serious too, since Jeongsup hyung’s letters were full of promises of travelling to Europe and getting married after graduation. Then there were the photos. Did Ahrin’s presence in them indicate that she was aware of her husband’s sexuality, or had he and Jeongsup hidden their relationship from her all that time?

They all looked so happy, and the letters were so full of optimism and hope for the future, until they weren’t. Jeongsup’s letters eventually grew shorter, less effusive and more simple recounting of the daily events at university. The final pieces in the box were five unopened envelopes marked ‘return to sender.’ Youngbin really felt for the young Jaeyoon. Long distance relationships were hard, but no one deserves to be ghosted like that, least of all the cute, sweet, and kind Lee Jaeyoon he had come to know.

_Damn it! You’re doing it again!_ Youngbin chastised himself. This pesky empathy was getting in the way of the job he was supposed to be doing. He flipped through the rest of the photographed documents. Nothing seemed to be sticking out as notable. He flagged the tax documents for a more detailed investigation, but everything else seemed useless. He was desperate to find something incriminating so that he wouldn’t have to resort to exposing the man for hiding his sexuality. He had always upheld some limits to what he was willing to do for a paycheck, and he really didn’t want to cross that boundary no matter how much was being offered.


	10. The Kind of Fun a Priest Can't Have

The next several weeks Youngbin spent trying to do as Ahrin had asked, well not what Inseong thought she’d asked, but what he had settled on, taking Jaeyoon out for drinks after school, going clubbing on the weekends, and introducing him to his and Inseong’s particular brand of karaoke. Inseong was mildly impressed by how well Jaeyoon was able to cut loose, while Youngbin accused his friend of being a corrupting influence.

It was Inseong’s turn to choose the evening’s entertainment, and that was why the three of them were standing in front of the entrance to a gay nightclub a few towns over.

“No way, absolutely not!” Jaeyoon insisted. “I can’t go in there.”

“Why not?” Inseong grinned predatorially.

“Come on Seong, he’s a happily married man.” Youngbin was barely able to hide his own amusement at his friend’s acting.

“Exactly!” Inseong threw an arm around Jaeyoon’s shoulders, “This is where I go whenever I have a steady or jealous girlfriend, because then she doesn’t have to worry about anyone successfully seducing me from her. Is Ahrin a jealous person?”

“N-no.” He stammered, staring at the door. Jaeyoon took a deep breath, “How about, if I go in tonight, you guys agree to come with me to jazz night at the piano bar next week?” He proposed.

“Oh God! Anything but that!” Inseong exclaimed dramatically.

Youngbin whacked the back of his head. “You’ve got yourself a deal.”

They walked in together, but Inseong quickly disappeared into the crowd. Jaeyoon slipped his hand into Youngbin’s and held on like his life depended on it. Youngbin just led him over to the bar and ordered them drinks. It took a good bit of coaxing, some funny stories and several alcoholic beverages, before Jaeyoon started relaxing. Youngbin just had to accept that his right hand now belonged to the younger man. He felt like he was actually growing addicted to the feeling, the weight of the other’s hand in his, the little squeezes punctuating their conversation, and the way he interlocked their fingers and pulled Youngbin out onto the dance floor.

Youngbin grinned. This was his house now, and he would pull out the stops. He dared the younger man to follow his lead as he demonstrated progressively more difficult and seductive dance moves. He was soon in fits of giggles as Jaeyoon laughed open-mouthed at his own failures and let loose these little wriggles of excitement whenever he successfully pulled off a move. Youngbin simply couldn’t stand it anymore. Jaeyoon’s face was shining, and he needed some of that light. He leaned forward and pressed his lips against the other’s laughing mouth. Jaeyoon pressed back, sharing more of himself, as if he sensed Youngbin’s need. Time froze as the two only existed for each other, in that moment. That moment which was harshly broken by ice water to the face.

“God! I can’t even leave you alone for five minutes and you’re eating each other’s faces.” Inseong complained, the now empty glass in his hand. Jaeyoon’s face started turning red.

“It’s been nearly three hours since you deserted us at the front door.” Youngbin pointed out, checking his watch for confirmation.

“I didn’t forget my job. I’ve been keeping an eye on you. See? Pictures to prove it.” Inseong held up his hand phone, showing off a rather intimate photo of the two of them at the bar, Youngbin talking and looking at their clasped hands while Jaeyoon gazed fondly at his face. “I even caught some of your weird mating ritual dance on video.”

“Y-your job?” Jaeyoon looked at Inseong with confusion written across his face.

Youngbin squeezed his hand, “You said we needed boundaries, so Inseong is supposed to keep me in line. I probably should have been upfront with you about that, but I wanted you to be more comfortable.”

Jaeyoon nodded slowly and grimaced. “Maybe we should go home. I’m starting to get a headache.”

“Do we need to call a cab?” Youngbin looked pointedly at Inseong.

“Nope,” he said proudly, “I refused so many drinks tonight I lost count.”

The long drive home was relatively silent. Jaeyoon leaned his head against the car window and closed his eyes, not engaging in conversation until Inseong pulled into his driveway, when he thanked them and reminded them that jazz night was on Thursday and to at least wear a collared shirt.

Inseong took the instruction to heart and scrounged up a pair of suspenders, a vest, and a fedora, which appalled Youngbin until Jaeyoon’s laughter at the get-up made it all worth it. Jazz really wasn’t Youngbin’s taste, but he had to admit the calm atmosphere and smooth baritone of the pianist provided a nice contrast to their previous escapades. Jaeyoon was definitely in his comfort zone, though, and his teacher side emerged as he taught them way more about jazz music than they ever desired to know.

As soon as Inseong learned how to make song requests, he started flagging down servers and handing them cocktail napkins with ‘Uptown Funk’ and ‘Gangnam Style’ written on them to deliver to the pianist until all of the servers began ignoring their booth.

“You’re so embarrassing.” Jaeyoon groaned, hiding his face in his hands.

When the pianist stopped for a break, he stepped down from his piano and headed straight in their direction.

“Ooh, you’ve done it now.” Youngbin jabbed Inseong in the ribs, “He’s coming for you.”

Instead, the pianist helped himself to the empty space on the bench in their booth and asked Jaeyoon to introduce his friends. It turned out the pianist was composing an original song for the school musical as a thanks for Jaeyoon’s help with vocals on his CD. Youngbin bought one of J.Don’s CDs on the spot.

“Whipped.” Inseong whispered. Youngbin responded with a quick kick to the shin.

J.Don managed to drag Jaeyoon up to the stage for a couple of songs, but not before Inseong plopped his fedora on his head. Watching Jaeyoon crooning Sinatra in his honey-smooth voice really did something to Youngbin. He was pretty sure he loved jazz now.

Jaeyoon returned to their booth amidst wild applause from his companions. Soon other patrons were dropping by to give their complements or sending drinks to their table. One such drink came with a note, which, as soon as read, prompted Jaeyoon to excuse himself and make his way over to the VIP section.

“Oh my God!” Inseong loudly whispered. “That’s Baek Zuho!”

“Wait, _that_ is Baek Zuho?” Youngbin had only ever known the man by name and reputation. He supposedly had his hands in all sorts of illegal operations in and around town, and now he was greeting and hugging their friend enthusiastically.

“What are you waiting for?” Inseong hissed, “You need to find out what’s going on. It’s your job!”

“Fucking hell.” Youngbin muttered. He was starting to wish he hadn’t come tonight, but it was too late now to deny what he was seeing, as the crime magnate stuffed a wad of bills in Lee Jaeyoon’s shirt pocket. The PI flipped on his audio recorder and strolled over towards the roped off area.

“I’m just glad I was able to help.” He heard Jaeyoon say.

“Well, it’s folks like you who are able to keep my business running. And if anyone tries to cause problems for your campaign, don’t hesitate to give me a call, and I’ll do what I can to help.”

Youngbin’s jaw dropped. This was actually something real. He quickly slipped into the men’s room as Jaeyoon turned back to his seat. He knew he should be happy with this development. This was exactly the sort of thing he’d been hoping for. So why did he feel so empty? He made his way back to the table, all of his enjoyment of the evening evaporated. Inseong shot him questioning glances, while Jaeyoon nudged his leg under the table and asked if he was feeling okay. Youngbin just tried to put a smile back on and suggested they head home, since they still had school the next day.

Since he had dance club on Fridays, Youngbin wouldn’t be able to talk to the mayor until Monday at the earliest, so he had the whole weekend to stew in self-pity. When his phone beeped in the middle of dance practice alerting him that Jaeyoon’s car was back at the OB/GYN office, he couldn’t be bothered to be curious anymore. He already had everything the mayor would need to destroy Lee Jaeyoon.


	11. Tacit Threats

“Happy Monday!” Youngkyun greeted the receptionist, as he stepped foot into the office, “How’s your morning so far?”

“Clearly not as good as yours,” she laughed, gratefully accepting the coffee he handed her. “Mayor Yoo always waits until the last minute to tell me when he’s going to be out of the office, and now I’m stuck scrambling, trying to reschedule all of his meetings.”

Youngkyun clicked his tongue sympathetically. Taeyang would be out all day golfing with Chairman Kang, so he was excited to have a quiet office, for once, where he might actually get some work done. “If you have trouble rescheduling any of the mayor’s meetings, let me know. I can probably take some of them.”

“The mayor isn’t here?”

Youngkyun turned to see a red-haired man standing in the doorway.

“Damn it all!” the man swore and turned to leave.

“Wait!” Youngkyun stopped him, “What was your business with the mayor? I’m the deputy mayor, so maybe I can help.”

“I’m Kim Youngbin,” the man introduced himself hesitantly. “I’m not sure how much he would have shared about our business though.”

Youngkyun’s eyes lit up. So, this was the private investigator Taeyang had hired. He definitely was not going to let this opportunity go to waste. He invited the man into his office and gave the receptionist strict instructions that they were not to be disturbed.

Kim Youngbin seemed very nervous as he sat across from Youngkyun describing the encounter he had observed between Lee Jaeyoon and Baek Zuho. The deputy mayor could barely hold it together as he listened to the audio file the PI played for him, finally exploding in laughter as it finished. Youngbin stared at him in confusion while he tried to catch his breath.

“Tell me Mr. Kim,” he gasped, “what do you know of Mr. Baek’s business dealings?”

“That he’s a con artist, involved in forging and money laundering?” Youngbin was really unsure where this was all going.

“I’ll let you in on a little secret,” Youngkyun leaned back in his chair, “The first time I did business with Mr. Baek, I helped facilitate the adoption of a rare breed of cat by our intern’s father. The thing is, that breed is entirely fictional. Mr. Baek and his associates are in the business of rescuing stray and mistreated animals. They restore the poor animals to health and forge pedigree papers for them in order to swindle entitled rich people who only want the most rare or exclusive breeds. On top of that, he is very philanthropic, giving back to anyone who helps rescue the poor animals and donating to a number of different charities in the area.”

The man sitting across from him looked simultaneously shocked and relieved.

“I really can’t blame you for thinking that about him. He does try to foster a particular image. He even changed his name from Juho to appear a little more edgy. It does wonders for his business. Rich people just love that feeling of doing something illegal to get what they want.”

Youngbin let out a weak laugh, “Well shit…”

“I take it that was the best you had?” Youngkyun smiled sympathetically.

The other man sighed and pulled out his checkbook. “Here, you can give the mayor back his advance pay. I quit.” Then he got up and just left.

Youngkyun smiled and shook his head. Lee Jaeyoon must really be something for the PI to turn up nothing after so long. He wondered briefly what it would be like to work with him instead of Taeyang until he remembered he wanted to get out of government all together. Maybe Juho would have a position somewhere for him in his organization. He made a mental note to check with the man.

The deputy mayor got so much work done in the first two hours of the day. Unfortunately, his productivity was not meant to last because a disheveled and panting Taeyang ran into his office, disrupting his workflow.

“Tell me you’ve been in contact with Chanhee!” he begged Youngkyun.

“Of course not, he hasn’t been back to visit since departing for university, and he always leaves my messages on ‘read’. What is this about?” Youngkyun asked.

Taeyang collapsed into the chair. “We’re so screwed.” He groaned. “Chanhee never went to university. He’s missing and Chairman Kang decided it’s all my fault. He could cut me off, and he knows too much about how I operate.”

“Well that’s not fair. Chanhee is an adult, and he hated his father long before he ever met us. I’m sure he just ran away from home to escape his father.” Youngkyun pointed out.

“I know, but it’s the Chairman. He has power and wants blood.”

Youngkyun watched his friend sighing heavily from across his desk. He knew he should probably feel more sympathetic, but it also felt like karma. “Feels different on this side of the barrel, doesn’t it, hyung.”

Taeyang sat straight up. “That’s it! How much do you think I should pay Kim Youngbin to hunt down Chanhee as well?”

“Right, about that…” Youngkyun handed over the check, “he quit.”

“Why? I gave him so much money.”

“I know. He gave it back.” He nodded at the check. “I guess he couldn’t find anything on the man.”

Taeyang stared at the check in his hand. “That’s weird. I never said he would have to return the advance if he failed. He could have just finished the job, there’s still several months to go until the election. Did he say anything to you about why he quit?”

Youngkyun paused, trying to recall the details of their encounter, “No, he just said he was quitting. Looked very relieved to do so, too.” He could see the wheels turning in Taeyang’s head. “Why? What are you thinking?”

“I don’t know. It’s just a nagging feeling that there’s something here I’m missing. None of it makes sense. No one would give up this much money for nothing. Do you think Lee Jaeyoon is holding something over him?”

Youngkyun shrugged. This was beyond him. He wasn’t built to be a political animal, always reading into everyone’s motivations and planning attacks and counterattacks. Surely the man had a right to quit for whatever reason he wanted regardless how sensible it was or how he chose to go about it. “Don’t you think Chanhee’s disappearance and the Chairman’s threats are a more pressing issue at the moment?”

“Yeah, you’re right,” Taeyang agreed, “This is why I need you, to keep my head on straight.”

“I try. I might not agree with a lot of stuff you do, but you’re my friend. I’m sure we can figure this thing out together.” Youngkyun patted his friend’s shoulder reassuringly, “Let’s go out for lunch. Your day off didn’t go as planned, I think you need a reset.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Grad school starts tomorrow and I have a funeral to attend, so no promises on a second update this week. If you're still reading this little story, thank you. It's been a lot of fun seeing where the characters take me, and I hope you are enjoying it as well.


	12. Daddy Issues

The musical was finally coming together. The extra help from Youngbin really was a lifesaver. The dancer was even coming to school on his off days to work on it, sitting in the back of Jaeyoon’s class, sketching out different choreographies and then trying to teach him the moves during breaks to make sure they weren’t too complicated for high schoolers. That didn’t last too long though, because the other teachers complained that their students were always late to class, preferring to stick around for the show in the music room. Subsequently, Jaeyoon and Youngbin stayed late after school nearly every day working out the details.

Youngbin opened up a whole new world of possibilities when he revealed his rapping skills, and he soon had a group of aspiring rappers clamoring for tutelage. Jaeyoon was able to get home at a relatively normal time on the days that Youngbin held his unofficial rap club after school, so he was surprised to see Ahrin waiting for him on the porch as he pulled into the driveway.

“What’s going on? Is something wrong?” he looked over her worriedly.

“No, honey bear,” she rose up on her toes to kiss him. “Hurry up, I have something for you.” She pulled him into the living room and pushed him down onto the couch. “Here!” She grinned and handed him a gift bag.

Jaeyoon eyed her curiously and opened the gift, pulling out a t-shirt that read, ‘World’s Best Daddy.’ He stared at the shirt until it finally clicked. “Are you serious? It actually worked?”

She laughed cheerfully. “Why are you so surprised? You’re so cute.” She patted his cheek. “Now we need to figure out how to tell our parents.”

“You haven’t told your parents yet?”

“Of course not, silly. You get to know first.”

“Oh right, that makes sense.” Jaeyoon paused for a moment, thinking. “Are you okay?” he asked, voice full of concern. “Are you having cravings? I’ll make you anything you want. Or I can rub your feet. Would you like me to rub your feet?”

Ahrin giggled at her husband’s sincerity. “I’m fine, honey. You’ll have all the time in the world to dote on me and our baby. Just let me take you out to dinner tonight though, before you start all of that.”

* * *

The flurry of telling the news to family and friends soon took over Jaeyoon and Ahrin’s life.

Seokwoo was delighted. “Is it a boy or a girl?” was the first thing he wanted to know. “I’ll knit a baby blanket for you.”

“First, it’s far too early to tell,” Ahrin said, “but we also decided to be surprised. A neutral color would be fine.”

“Okay! Should the baby call me Uncle Seokwoo or Grandfather Marcellinus?”

Sanghyuk was beyond ecstatic. “This is perfect!” he shouted, jumping out of his chair. He pulled up the calendar on his phone, “You could give a press conference Friday, do you think? Or is that too soon? How many people do you have to tell? Do you need two, three weeks? Or I could just draft up an announcement for the newspaper, but I think a public appearance as a family would be best. Honestly Jaeyoon, your timing is impeccable. This will be a huge boost to your ratings.”

Jaeyoon gaped at the rambling man. “We didn’t do this for the campaign, Hyuk!”

Jaeyoon failed to intercept Youngbin in time before he walked into the faculty lounge and caught sight of a half-eaten cake that had ‘Congratulations Jaeyoon’ written across the top.

“What’s this about?” he asked his assembled colleagues.

“Jaeyoon is having a baby.”

“I’m not having a baby, my wife is.” Jaeyoon clarified.

“I’m fairly confident no one was confused about that,” Miss Jung snickered. “Do you want a slice, Youngbin?”

Jaeyoon turned fully red with embarrassment and went back to refilling his coffee, dropping and shattering his mug in his rush to escape the uncomfortable situation.

Youngbin seemed unusually reserved during class, and Jaeyoon was afraid he had offended his friend by not telling him the news personally. He had been meaning to do that today, but Principal Moon had found out somehow and had his secretary order the cake. But when he tried to explain that to Youngbin, all he got in response was a short, “It’s okay. Don’t worry about it.”

The comment didn’t make Jaeyoon feel any better, especially as Youngbin remained distracted and distant throughout the day.

“Oh darling,” Ahrin sighed, massaging his scalp as he rested his throbbing head on her lap that evening. “I imagine it was a bit of a shock for him. Give him some time to process it and keep showing how much you care about him and his friendship.”

Jaeyoon rolled over so that he could look up at her. His heart ached at how much love it held for this woman, so giving and supportive, a constant source of joy in his life. He knew others might not understand their marriage, but, to him, Ahrin was the perfect life partner, and now she was the mother of his child. Jaeyoon placed his hand over her abdomen. “I should be taking care of you,” he murmured guiltily. He pushed himself up only for the sharp pain that shot through his head to force him back down with a whimper.

Ahrin’s eyebrows furrowed. “Don’t you think you should get that checked out?”

“I’m okay, it’s only a headache,” Jaeyoon assured her, eyes squeezed shut. “I should probably just go to bed.”

“You just hold tight; I’ll make you your tea.” She carefully moved him off her lap and slid a pillow under his head.

“Thank you Rinn,” he murmured, “Sorry for being such a baby.”

“Nonsense, you’re such a cute baby. I could never be cross with you.” She kissed his button nose and slipped off to the kitchen to fix the tea and an ice pack for Jaeyoon’s head. He had never been one to complain, but then he was also never sick, so maybe she just didn’t know how much of a man-baby he could be when he was feeling under the weather.

Jaeyoon was snoring softly when she returned, so she retrieved a blanket and tucked him in where he lay. She couldn’t imagine his position was very comfortable the way his legs dangled off the side of the couch, but at least it seemed his headache wasn’t bad enough to keep him from sleep. Ahrin picked up her book and settled in the chair across from him to wait for him to wake up enough where she could get him to bed.


	13. A Prodigal Son

Youngkyun read the last text for what felt like the millionth time. _Don’t tell Tae, and don’t you fucking dare say anything to the Chairman,_ it read.

Chanhee had finally contacted him, and now he was on his way to meet the wayward intern at Juho’s headquarters. He couldn’t _wait_ to hear his excuse for this one.

“I joined a cult.”

Youngkyun choked. “You what?”

“Is the Chairman pissed? Tell me everything!” Chanhee said eagerly.

“Hold up, you tell us you joined a cult and then ask about your dad without offering any explanation? No, we’re not doing that. Taeyang is going out of his mind.”

“Sorry,” Chanhee said, not looking sorry at all, “but you know how Tae cozies up to the Chairman. I couldn’t risk saying anything to him.”

“So?” Youngkyun pressed, “why’d you do it?”

“I want to know too,” Juho added, stroking his cat. “Argh! Huru, stop biting daddy!”

“There isn’t really anything to tell. Some girl approached me on the street, and I thought, _what better way to mess with the Chairman?_ So, I signed right up.”

“That’s all?”

“What? Am I supposed to have another reason or something?” Chani crossed his arms over his chest and pouted.

“I guess not?” Youngkyun was so confused. “So what? You just hung out with a cult for a few months and then came back?”

“Well, I liquidated a bunch of the Chairman’s stocks to support the cult, got married, and then they kicked me out, because I wasn’t a true believer, or something like that.” Chanhee reported calmly, picking at his fingernails.

"You got married? What the hell, Chanhee!"

“Oh yeah. That reminds me, Juho hyung, you think you can hook me up with a divorce? I just want to wait until she shows up at the Chairman’s door to introduce herself as his daughter-in-law. I gave her his address in the event that I ever disappeared. I can just imagine how he would react. It will be hilarious.”

Youngkyun was starting to wonder if Chanhee was all right in the head. “Are you okay though?” he asked. “I know you said it was all about your father but getting involved with cults can be pretty messy.”

“Well that’s why I came here,” Chanhee explained. “Juho figures he can protect me.”

Juho shrugged. “My team is good at what they do. I don’t see why we can’t expand our services a little bit.”

“Okay,” Youngkyun sighed, “I’m glad you’re alive and well at least. I hope it’s all worth it.”

“Oh, it will be,” Chanhee grinned, “I just need to find a journalist I can trust to expose the cult and publicly humiliate the Chairman in the process.”

Youngkyun hummed thoughtfully. “I think I can help you with that.”

* * *

Chairman Kang was furious and somehow it was Taeyang’s fault? The mayor paced his office, reeling from the meeting he had just had with the Chairman and trying to comprehend the mess he found himself in.

So, Chanhee screwed over his dad. It’s not like Taeyang had coerced him into doing it. Chanhee had made his own incomprehensible decisions, and yet the Chairman seemed intent on holding Taeyang responsible for all the crazy things his son had done to him. He sighed and collapsed into his office chair. Just because he was the mayor didn’t mean he could magically restore Chairman Kang’s stocks and reputation. _The man should just hire his own PR manager,_ Taeyang thought ruefully. _What an absolute jerk he was, threatening me like that._

Taeyang took a closer look at the newspaper the Chairman had left on his desk. The cult story was blazed across the front page. He wondered if the paper or the reporter covering the story might be susceptible to blackmail. _Terry Kim._ That name sounded familiar. Wasn’t he the one who had been covering the election news? He flipped through the paper. A Shin Hongseop had written the most recent election update. _Not much of an update,_ he noted. His opponent was such a boring person. He couldn’t blame Terry Kim for jumping ship for a much more interesting story.

That’s what Chairman Kang needed: a more interesting story that could shift attention away from his problems and errant son. Taeyang sighed. How on earth was he supposed to find a better story than the chaebul son who joined a cult? Maybe he should just pass that suggestion on to the Chairman and let his people find some crazy story to flip the news cycle. They could make up something for all he cared. He had his own problems to deal with as the polling data continued to veer more and more in Lee Jaeyoon’s favor what with his wife’s pregnancy and all that.

He probably should just give up and find a job he actually enjoyed like Youngkyun always suggested, but he could just see the disappointment in his parent’s eyes. They loved being able to tell people about their son the mayor, and it would be devastating to have to explain why he wasn’t. No, the only thing to do was keep pushing forward until he died, or they died, whichever came first. At this rate, it would probably be him busting open an aneurysm from all this stress.

Yoo Taeyang sighed, picked up his phone, and got to work.


	14. Insensible

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> tw: seizure

Youngbin wasn’t sure what to think about the way Jaeyoon was acting around him. He really tried to keep his distance out of respect for the man’s decision to expand his family, but, for some reason, Jaeyoon seemed to be trying to find ways to spend more time with him, even throwing him a surprise birthday party with Inseong’s assistance. Eventually, he decided to quit worrying and go along with it. If Jaeyoon wanted to try to maintain both relationships, that was his prerogative. Youngbin was done trying to protect him from the consequences of his own choices, so he resumed his previous habits of spending time with him outside of school hours.

Inseong was unable to join them a lot of the time due to his new assignment, following the big cult story, but Jaeyoon didn’t seem to mind his absence at all. Youngbin was slightly more careful not to initiate anything, but, if Jaeyoon wanted to pin him down on the picnic blanket and make out at the secluded beach they’d found, who was he to stop him? He was an adult and could make whatever self-destructive decisions he wanted. Youngbin only felt guilty every time he saw Ahrin and her growing belly, because he really liked her, and she always seemed so happy to see him.

At Inseong’s suggestion, Youngbin tried going out on dates with other, more available, men, but that was an abysmal failure.

“Remember that time I tried to quit smoking?” Youngbin asked his roommate after one such date. “I wasn’t myself, always ornery, and everything I tried to do to distract from the cravings just pissed me off? That’s how I feel now with all these stupid dates. I nearly bit that poor guy’s head off just because he offered me a bite of his dessert. Is it possible to be addicted to a person? God, it’s so annoying!”

Inseong stared wide-eyed at Youngbin and slowly pushed a bottle of soju across the counter to him. “I think you need this more than I do.”

* * *

“You mind?” Jaeyoon yelled from behind the stage.

Youngbin threw one last shot, cheering as the ball swished through the hoop. “Get ya, get ya, get ya head in the game,” he chanted, sliding up next to the piano Jaeyoon was trying to tune before their first stage rehearsal for the musical.

“We’re not doing that one. Never will, so long as I have a say in things around here,” he grumbled at the piano keys.

“Oooh, got something against it?” Youngbin teased.

Jaeyoon just stared at the keys, a look of confusion crossing his face. “I… I don’t…” He fell forward, his head smacking into the piano.

“Yoonie?” Panic rose in Youngbin’s chest with every second that passed. Jaeyoon began sliding sideways, and he rushed forward to catch him before he fell off the bench. “Help!” Youngbin screamed, trapped under Jaeyoon’s weight as he began convulsing. He wrestled the man’s body off the bench, trying not to stumble as he laid him on the floor, cradling his head on his knees. “Someone, help!” he cried desperately, “Please, Jaeyoon. God! Help him!” Gradually, the convulsions eased up and Jaeyoon’s ragged breathing returned to normal.

“Oh God, Jaeyoon, are you okay?”

Tears leaked from the corners of Jaeyoon’s eyes as they moved around the room, finally landing on Youngbin’s worried face. He groaned and lifted a head to his head.

“Can you get up?” Youngbin asked.

Jaeyoon just looked at him uncomprehendingly. A wave of utter helplessness swept over him. He wasn’t sure who would still be around the school at this time of day, but he didn’t know what else to do as he picked up Jaeyoon in his arms and carried him out of the gym. The elderly Mr. Oh heard his cries for help, as he wandered the hallways, and assisted him in sliding Jaeyoon into the back seat of his car after offering to drive them to the hospital.

Youngbin was about to call Ahrin when he remembered she was working, so he felt through Jaeyoon’s pockets and called her from his phone instead. After a moment of shock, she sprang into action, asking if Jaeyoon was breathing normally and promising that they’d be ready for them when they arrived. Sure enough, a nurse’s aide was waiting at the ER entrance with a wheelchair and helped him out of the car. By then Jaeyoon was at least able to follow instructions, but he still seemed confused.

Youngbin felt lost in the flurry of activity that followed, feeling like he was in the way, until Ahrin instructed him to talk to the neurologist and describe everything that had happened. She sat by the head of the bed, stroking Jaeyoon’s hand and talking softly in his ear.

“Ahrin, baby, why are you here?” his voice cracked.

“You’re at the hospital, honey, I don’t think those headaches were nothing. How often were you having them really?”

“Hurts,” he groaned, squeezing his eyes shut.

“It’s okay, sweetie, we’ll figure it out. Dr. Kim is the best neurologist I know. He’ll take good care of you.”

After Jaeyoon was wheeled out of the room for imaging, Youngbin collapsed into the chair next to Ahrin, and the floodgates released. She took his hand and rubbed his back.

“You did well, Youngbin oppa. We’re lucky you were there for him, but you need to take care of yourself too. Go home and get some rest. He’ll be kept overnight at least for monitoring and more tests. I’ll text you with updates.” She pulled him into a long hug. “Thank you.”

Youngbin walked out in a daze and was surprised to find that Mr. Oh had stuck around to drive him home.

Inseong spent the night in Youngbin’s bed, holding him, while he cried himself to sleep.

 _There’s a mass in his brain,_ Ahrin’s text greeted him when he woke up. _Don’t plan on coming in until afternoon. They’re doing surgery. I’ll text you._

Inseong immediately called out of work to keep Youngbin company and prevent him from doing anything stupid.

Ahrin texted again at four in the evening with their hospital room number.

Jaeyoon grinned widely when he saw Youngbin and Inseong. “Hey hyung!” he greeted, “I never have to watch High School Musical ever again, since it’s a real trigger now.” The Busan satoori that Youngbin had only ever noticed when Jaeyoon drank too much was now out in full strength.

Youngbin smiled, relieved to see him joking around.

“Don’t look so bad for having been through brain surgery, do I? But I wish they’d have shaved my whole head instead of just this one spot,” he pouted, pointing at the bald spot around the incision on the left side of his head, “and my hair is sticky from the things they put on my head.”

“He’s not used to pain meds,” Ahrin explained. “They gave him some strong ones.”

“It’s not that,” Jaeyoon protested, “I’m delirious from lack of sleep. Those nurses woke me up every hour to shine a light in my eyes all night long.”

“Oh God, Yoonie, are you really okay?” Youngbin wanted to believe Jaeyoon was doing as well as he appeared, but images from the day before kept flashing through his mind, making him relive all of the horror he had felt through it all.

“Of course, now that you’re here, hyung.” Jaeyoon laughed, “but can you make Rinnie go home? She’s supposed to be growing my baby.”

Youngbin shot a questioning look at Ahrin. She shrugged, “I could use some time to run home and grab a few things, if you don’t mind sticking around for a bit.”

“Of course not.” He caught Jaeyoon glaring pointedly at him and added, “I could even stay the night, so you can sleep in your own bed.” That seemed to satisfy Jaeyoon, who grinned gave him a thumbs up.

Ahrin relented after securing a solemn promise from all three men that they would obey the nurses. Inseong ran home as well, returning with toothbrushes, pajamas, and the old clippers he’d bought years ago as a business venture during university and ROKA, then laid all his charm on the charge nurse to obtain permission to cut Jaeyoon’s hair under strict supervision.

Despite the excitement, Youngbin had no problem passing out in the chair beside Jaeyoon’s bed, barely noting the nurse’s movements in and out of the room throughout the night. Ahrin came back early in the morning with breakfast for Youngbin and Inseong, which they ate while waiting for Jaeyoon to return from his brain scans. He hadn’t had any more seizures, so his doctor was hopeful he could be moved out of intensive care and maybe go home in a couple days.

Youngbin and Inseong were discussing heading back home when sounds of a commotion reached the room. Curious, Inseong got up and stepped out into the hallway to investigate.

“No! No fucking way!” a voice shouted from the hall, “You do not get to talk to him, you fucking bastard!”

Inseong stepped back into the room, pale as a sheet, “It’s Lee Sanghyuk.”

A moment later Sanghyuk barreled through the door. “What the hell Jaeyoon! Didn’t I tell you not to talk to any reporters unless I make the arrangements? Don’t say another word to that snake until we can discuss this!” He slammed a newspaper on Jaeyoon’s tray table, just as two security guards tackled him and dragged him from the room.

Right on the front page of the newspaper was the picture Inseong had taken at the nightclub, as the headline asked the question: _Is Mayoral Candidate Lee Jaeyoon Hiding Male Lover From Pregnant Wife?_

Youngbin turned to Inseong in shock. He had never felt so betrayed in his life. “How could you?” He could barely suppress the rage in his voice, “you promised you wouldn’t write anything. How much did the mayor pay you?”

“It wasn’t me!” Inseong cried, shrinking away under Youngbin’s fury, “I recused myself from all of the election coverage. You’ve got to believe me Bin!”

The charge nurse stepped into the room, “You have to keep it down here. We have a zero-tolerance policy for loud noises in the neuro unit.”

“Then why is your picture in the fucking paper?” Youngbin hissed at Inseong.

“I don’t know.” Inseong looked like he was about to cry. “Really, I don’t.”

“Hyung?” Youngbin turned at the sound of Jaeyoon’s soft voice. He was looking at the newspaper in confusion. “Are you really a private investigator?”

Youngbin’s stomach dropped as he looked at the article himself. Sure enough, it identified him as _Kim Youngbin, Private Investigator._ “It’s not what you’re thinking,” he said.

“What do you think I’m thinking, Youngbin?” Jaeyoon’s eyes were full of sadness as he looked at him, waiting for some explanation.

“I... I,” Youngbin couldn’t think of any lies that could get him out of this mess, and he didn’t want to do it anymore. “Yes, I am. I’m so sorry Jaeyoon. I couldn’t follow through with it though. I quit months ago.”

Jaeyoon was crying now, shoulders heaving and tears streaming down his cheeks. Ahrin pulled him into her arms and rubbed his back comfortingly. “I think you two should probably leave,” she said softly but firmly.


	15. Fallout and Forgiveness

The following days were hell. Inseong let Youngbin keep the apartment and moved to a motel to give him space to be angry at him, sending Jaejin hyung to check on him and make sure he was eating and sleeping sufficiently and not punching holes through the walls of the apartment. Principal Moon called to say that the dance club had to be cancelled due to the demands of several parents, and, since he had been hired under false pretenses, surely, he could understand why the decision had to be made. Youngbin dyed his hair black to avoid unwarranted attention, and his work phone blew up with calls from people who were definitely not interested in hiring him.

The worst part, though, was seeing Jaeyoon’s name dragged through the mud everywhere he looked. He wanted to scream from the rooftops, “He’s not like that! Lee Jaeyoon is a good man!” but he knew his endorsement would mean nothing to the general public. Hell, the general public wouldn’t even accept a Catholic priest’s validation of his good character. It took three days for Jaeyoon to release the statement that he was ending his campaign for mayor to focus on his family and his health, and to please, as he was withdrawing from public life, respect his wife’s privacy.

Youngbin found that the atmosphere in the town became too stifling and took a job that would get him out of there for a couple months at least. It was good to be away from the slander and scrutiny and not be reminded of Jaeyoon everywhere he went, but he was also very lonely.

He missed Inseong’s presence much more than he had anticipated. He knew now that he had no reason to be angry with him. Just last week Jaejin had mailed him a packet of information that Inseong had put together to confirm his innocence. Inseong apparently had no idea that his phone automatically backed up his photos to cloud storage, so even when he deleted the incriminating pictures from his phone, they were still out there ready to be hacked by anyone who didn’t like him, and he had made some powerful enemies by taking on the Kang story.

The problem was that Youngbin felt guilty for not believing his best friend, and it was really hard to fess up.

Youngbin scrolled through his friend’s Twitter feed, trying to work up the courage to make the call, to apologize. It had been too long, and he needed to mend their relationship. He was laughing through Inseong’s classic humor, evident in all his posts, when something unusual caught his eye. Inseong had retweeted a link to a video from an asexual support group. The oddness of it prompted Youngbin to click the link. Immediately he understood why Inseong would have interacted with the tweet.

Han Ahrin appeared on his computer screen, standing in front of her house, surrounded by reporters.

“What is your problem?” she sounded tired and frustrated, “If I say he never cheated, he never cheated. I understand you are all hung up on the fact that my husband is sexually attracted to men. Well, I’m not attracted to anyone. Does that mean I don’t deserve to be married, to have children? Will our child be considered less than others because we conceived without having sex? Sex shouldn’t be the foundation for a marriage, and, if it is for you, you have my pity. I would bet my entire paycheck that my Jaeyoon bakes me a cake more frequently than your spouse has sex with you. Our marriage works because we communicate and love each other unconditionally. Now, if you’ll please let me go, my husband needs me, because he has a fucking brain tumor!”

Youngbin sat back, stunned. The video was from two days after the article, the day before Jaeyoon officially withdrew from the race. He scrolled through the comments. Some were calling her rude, but others expressed admiration, promised to pray for her husband’s health, or posted pictures of cakes. He looked over at his phone where it was open to Inseong’s contact page waiting for him to press the call button and make amends. He pressed the back arrow and chose a different name.

“Youngbin?” Ahrin answered after only three rings.

“Is there any chance for forgiveness?” He didn’t want to give himself any time to chicken out. There was silence on the other end for what felt like an hour, but it couldn’t have been more than a few seconds.

“Can you meet me for coffee?” she responded eventually. “I can’t do this over the phone.” The comment made him feel uneasy, but at least it wasn’t an outright ‘no.’ They made arrangements to meet when she got off work the next day at the café next to the hospital. Youngbin called Inseong to tell him he was coming home.

* * *

“I’m so glad to see you,” Inseong threw his arms around Youngbin, “You have no idea. I really thought that was going to be our last fight.”

“I was being stupid and stubborn,” Youngbin acknowledged. “Thanks for not giving up though, that file you sent was something. You’ll become a good investigative journalist yet.”

“I learned from the best, and investigating the cult is giving me some good experience,” he laughed. “Speaking of learning from experience, you’ve gotta hear what Sanghyuk is up to now.”

Youngbin raised an eyebrow. He wasn’t sure why Inseong would think he cared about what Lee Sanghyuk did.

“He finally figured out that mudslinging only works if the target cares about appearing clean, so he managed to get Baek Juho on the ballot for mayor. It’s genius really. The mayor is beside himself trying to pin something on Mr. Baek that he doesn’t already freely admit. Plus, he has proven business acumen and organizational skills.”

“You don’t have to convince me to vote for him,” Youngbin laughed. He missed this. The easy friendship with Inseong, how they could pick up right where they left off. The two stayed up most of the night catching up each other on everything that had happened while they’d been apart, and it helped keep Youngbin’s mind off of his upcoming meeting.

* * *

Ahrin was waiting for him when Youngbin arrived at the café. “I’m really glad you came,” she said as he took a seat across from her. “I wanted to believe you really did care about him.” She gave him a small smile. “People were saying you were working for the mayor, so when you disappeared, we could only assume the worst.”

Youngbin hung his head. “It’s true though,” he admitted. “Mayor Yoo did hire me to investigate Jaeyoon. I just couldn’t finish the job. I couldn’t bear for anything bad to happen to him. I ran away because I thought I’d ruined your marriage. I couldn’t handle the guilt.”

“You didn’t know,” she nodded understandingly.

“No, not until I saw that video of you and the reporters.”

“Yeah,” she sighed, “I really didn’t think through that one. Turns out most people don’t appreciate it when you insult their sex lives. It didn’t win us any sympathy from the press,” she said bitterly.

“Can you forgive me?” Youngbin asked earnestly, “Do you think he would?”

“As far as I’m concerned, you may have saved his life when he had that seizure, so I believe I could forgive nearly anything,” she said, “but Jaeyoon has some deep-seeded trust issues. He had a boyfriend before who broke his heart, and I don’t think it ever healed properly. I can’t promise you anything, but you should at least try, for your own sake, before it’s too late.”

“What?” Youngbin hoped he had misheard.

“He’s not going to survive this,” her voice cracked. “We don’t know how long he has left, a year at most, but the tumor is very aggressive, and it wasn’t responding to the chemo and radiation, so we stopped treatments last week. He just wants to be able to live what life he has left.”

Youngbin felt sick. Jaeyoon had looked so good after the surgery, it hadn’t even occurred to him that he was wasting precious time by going away for so long. “I-I need to see him.”

“Of course,” Ahrin agreed. “Youngbin… I wanted to ask you,” she hesitated, “Well, it’s not really my place to say this, but I know he wouldn’t ever bring it up himself. If you still find yourselves attracted to each other, would you at least consider acting on it? It’s just that everything I’ve read about brain tumors said it’s important to maintain your normal sex life, and, since that hasn’t ever been a part of our relationship… I just think it might be good for him to feel desired in that way.”

Youngbin’s mouth dropped open as he stared at her in stunned silence.

“But only if you truly want it. Don’t feel like it’s something you have to do,” she added. “He does get suspicious of people trying to do nice things for him nowadays. And he’s really stubborn. He always insists that, if I don’t need sex, he doesn’t either. We had several fights about that actually, while he was seeing you. But maybe now that you know I’m okay with it, you can persuade him to at least try it. Hell, even I had sex a few times before deciding it wasn’t for me.”

“You’re kidding me.” It was incomprehensible to Youngbin that Jaeyoon could be a virgin.

Ahrin sighed, “If I had known, before we got married, I would have made that a condition for our engagement. I just assumed he and Jeongsup had been doing it all the time they were together. But that jerk boyfriend was just stringing him along with empty promises, leaving him broken hearted and emotionally scarred. I honestly don’t know what I would do, if I ever run into Jeongsup again.”

“Shit,” Youngbin thought back to the many times he had been confused by Jaeyoon’s behavior, “I really misunderstood him. What if I make things worse?”

“Don’t worry about it then, if you’re going to stress yourself out overthinking everything. Just come over for dinner on Friday and whatever happens will happen.” Ahrin stood up and gave Youngbin a hug. “You really made him happy for a while, and if you can just work it out, I think any way you are in his life would be good for him.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Updates coming fast, because I finished it and can't afford to keep spending all my time thinking about the story now that school has started. Come hang out with me on Twitter @Mel90S


	16. A New Consciousness

Youngbin didn’t think he’d ever been more nervous in his life. It was a testament to how badly he wanted things to go well.

“You’ll be fine,” Inseong assured him. “Aren’t Catholics supposed to forgive everyone?”

“It’s Ahrin who’s Catholic, not him.” The carpet was wearing thin from the track Youngbin was pacing.

“Oh, then you’re definitely screwed.”

“No!” Youngbin threw a couch cushion at his roommate, “Don’t say that. I’m already freaking out enough.”

“At least it seems that you have her on your side.”

“Thank you!” Youngbin exclaimed, “See that’s the kind of encouragement I need.”

Now, as he stood in front of Jaeyoon’s house, the doubts came rushing back. The porch light blinked on, and Ahrin stepped out of the door to greet him.

“Come on,” she linked an arm in his and dragged him into the house. “Just, heads up, I didn’t tell him you were coming.” He followed her into the living room. “Honey, you have a visitor,” she called out.

Jaeyoon was at the piano, back to them, hunched over, writing in a manuscript notebook. Youngbin’s stomach clenched at the sight, reacting instinctively to the memory of the last time he saw him at a piano. Jaeyoon’s shaven hair had grown back, but not enough to obscure the scar on his head. His shirt hung loose from his frame, and, as he turned to see them, Youngbin noted how thin his face had become.

“Oh, it’s you!”

Youngbin smiled sheepishly, “Hey Jaeyoon.”

Jaeyoon watched as he came closer. “I didn’t think I’d see you again,” he said softly.

“Yeah,” Youngbin hung his head in shame, “but I couldn’t just leave things the way they ended. He dropped to his knees by Jaeyoon’s feet and presented him with the bunny plushie he’d brought in his bag.

“What is this?” Jaeyoon laughed.

“Will you accept my apology?” Youngbin squeezed the paw, and the bunny started beatboxing. Jaeyoon’s grin grew wider when Youngbin’s voice came out of the plushie, rapping his apology.

“Ah, cute,” Jaeyoon said, admiring the gift.

“Inseong did the beatboxing. He wanted me to tell you that he is sorry too. He was hacked, seriously,” Youngbin added. “Do you think you could forgive me?” He looked up at Jaeyoon earnestly, hardly daring to breathe.

“I-I think I could do that.” Jaeyoon studied his face, “Y-you came back, and it’s not like I have anything to lose.”

“Gosh Jaeyoon, I don’t know what to say,” Youngbin’s voice cracked. “I’d give anything to have met you under different circumstances.”

Jaeyoon motioned for him to get up and opened his arms for a hug. “It’s okay, hyung, really. If it hadn’t been you, it would have been someone else, and you wouldn’t be here with me now.” He rubbed Youngbin’s back as the man clung to him.

“If you boys are done making up, dinner is here,” Ahrin yelled from the other room. “You can stay for dinner, right, Youngbin?” she asked, as if that wasn’t their previously agreed-upon plan.

“Absolutely.” Youngbin pulled Jaeyoon up off the piano bench, keeping an arm around his waist as they joined her in the kitchen. He felt like he could be happy so long as he was touching the man.

Ahrin looked up from where she was unpacking the delivery containers and smiled. “Hey, darling, do we have enough of your mother’s kimchi left?”

Jaeyoon laughed brightly. “Do you never open the fridge? There’s like twenty kilos in here.” He pulled open the door of the refrigerator and grabbed one of the many containers from the shelf. “You should have given me a heads-up that you were coming,” he told Youngbin, as they set everything out on the table, “I would have cooked something special.”

Youngbin caught the expression that crossed Ahrin’s face at that comment and understood why she hadn’t told her husband. “This is great though,” he insisted, “you can do that some other time. Maybe you could teach me how to cook.” Jaeyoon’s eyes lit up, and Youngbin felt weak.

“Well, if you’ll excuse me,” Ahrin said when they’d finished eating and cleaning up, “I’ve got to get to the hospital. I'm on nightshift,” she explained. “See you in the morning, honey.” Ahrin kissed Jaeyoon’s cheek and quickly disappeared.

“I didn’t know she worked the nightshift,” Youngbin remarked.

“Not usually, no, but she said a friend needed her to swap shifts at the last moment.”

Youngbin chuckled. He had to admire the way the little lady had played them both. He snuggled up against Jaeyoon’s side and rested his head on his shoulder.

Jaeyoon wrapped an arm around him and held him close. “Do you want some coffee, tea, chocolate milk?” Jaeyoon offered. “I know we have wine somewhere in the house. Ahrin made me hide it from her, if I can remember where I put it.”

“Mm’good,” Youngbin murmured into his neck. He felt the younger man shiver beside him.

“Ah hyung, you drive me crazy.” Jaeyoon's voice was soft and low and tugged at Youngbin's very core.

“I think I’m falling for you,” he heard himself saying. Several seconds of silence passed, and he lifted his head to see tears running down Jaeyoon’s face.

“Please don’t, hyung. It’s too hard,” Jaeyoon choked out. “I can’t bear hurting you too. I’m not worth it.”

Youngbin felt stunned. “How can you say such a thing?”

An anguished look crossed Jaeyoon’s face. “I’m not stupid. I see when Ahrin’s mask slips. I’m destroying her. She had a panic attack the other day when I mentioned I might register as an organ donor. I-I can’t be responsible for anyone else’s pain.”

“Oh Yoonie!” Youngbin folded him into his arms, letting him cry into his chest. “It isn’t your fault. None of this is your fault.”

“I know,” Jaeyoon sobbed, “but I still feel horrible. I’m leaving her to raise our daughter alone.”

“You gave her a piece of yourself to love. I really doubt she regrets sharing a child with you.” Youngbin shifted their positions, so they could make eye contact. He brushed the tears away, “Let’s just live for today," he whispered, "future be damned.” He tilted the Jaeyoon’s face up to examine it. “I, for one, want to spend every moment right here,” he kissed the man’s forehead, “and here,” he kissed his nose, “and here,” he kissed the right cheek then the left, “and here,” he whispered, claiming Jaeyoon’s lips for his own.

Those lips became a portal to another universe as they parted and welcomed Youngbin in. The world dissolved away from them, and they danced together in that universe, matching passion with passion. Youngbin could no longer tell where he ended and Jaeyoon began, as they poured themselves into the creation of a new consciousness.

With great regret, Youngbin retreated from their new world to replenish his mortal form with air. Jaeyoon’s eyes fluttered open to meet his. “Hyung.” He spoke softly, reverently. He had said that word to Youngbin a million times, but it felt different now. Youngbin knew now that being Jaeyoon’s hyung was now his most important role in life.

“Hyung is here,” Youngbin replied, voice thick with emotion. He rested his forehead against the other’s. “Let me give you the rest of me,” he whispered.

Jaeyoon let out a shuddering breath. “That’s not necessary,” he murmured, “you’ve already done so much for me, given me more than I could imagine.”

Youngbin placed several kisses on the side of his neck. “You don’t get it,” he said between kisses, “I want you, Yoonie. I want you more than I’ve ever wanted anyone.”

Jaeyoon tugged him off his neck and held Youngbin’s face in front of him, so he could look at his eyes. “Say that again,” he demanded.

Youngbin met his gaze, “I want to make love to you, Lee Jaeyoon.”

“Okay,” Jaeyoon whispered, “then do it.” He stood up and reached out a hand for Youngbin to take and led him to the bedroom.

Jaeyoon threw himself backwards onto the bed, pulling Youngbin along with him and flung out his arms. “Ravish me sir!” he exclaimed dramatically before erupting into a fit of giggles. The little expressions of delight thrust themselves into Youngbin’s soul, filling it with light, and he pressed himself into the source, unwilling to let any of that light escape into the night. The giggles subsided as Jaeyoon responded in kind.

They lay like that together for several minutes, reveling in the sweetness of each other’s lips until Jaeyoon stopped abruptly. “Wait, I don’t have any supplies,” he said, a look of consternation crossing his face.

Youngbin chuckled and dropped another quick kiss, “Good thing I came prepared. I'll be right back.” He pushed himself off the bed and went to retrieve the lube and condoms from his bag. He returned to find Jaeyoon sitting on the side of the bed still looking worried. “What’s the matter?” Youngbin asked gently, taking a seat next to the man.

“It’s just, I-I’ve never actually had sex,” he confessed. “Well, I tried with Ahrin after that first time you came over, because she thought it might help, but I couldn’t make it work.” He hesitated a moment. “I thought you should know, i-in case you wanted to change your mind.”

“That doesn’t bother me,” Youngbin patted his thigh reassuringly. “I mean, it would, if we were trying to hook up in a men’s room at some seedy bar, but we’re not doing that. We have plenty of time to do this right.”

“Hmm,” Jaeyoon looked thoughtful. “How long ‘til I’m ready for seedy bar sex?” he joked.

“Shut up,” Youngbin smiled and kissed him, “and, hopefully never.” He peeled off Jaeyoon’s shirt and pushed him gently back down on the bed.

Jaeyoon blushed under Youngbin's gaze. “You should have seen my abs before the chemo," he started. "They were great. You’d have like them a lot. Great personalities. I can tell you their names, so you can greet them well, when they come back.”

“You’re rambling, Yoonie,” Youngbin laughed. “Just relax. Let hyung take care of you.” The rest of their clothes soon found their way to the floor.

Youngbin poured himself into the reverent worship of Jaeyoon’s body, reveling in the man’s responsiveness to his lips, his hands, his heat. With great care, he coached him through the preparation process, reminding him to breathe and distracting him with many gentle kisses. Youngbin’s heart filled to overflowing, and he let that feeling guide him as he entered and filled Jaeyoon at last.

His soul cried out in recognition, as if it had known and loved the other in a past life. He could feel Jaeyoon’s emotions like they were his own. He looked at the man’s face in wonder. Jaeyoon’s eyes were filling with tears.

“It’s you,” he reached out to touch Youngbin’s face, “You’re really here.”

Youngbin’s heart ached with a longing that grew stronger until his body released him from its mortal tether to join with Jaeyoon to become one heart, one soul, one body. Slowly his consciousness drifted back to earth in a daze, his heart begging him to stay in that perfect union. It felt like a dream, but the warm breath on his face confirmed that it was real. Youngbin leaned over to kiss the parted lips of the insensible man and pulled him close as he waited patiently for his other half to return to his arms.


	17. My Song

It took a bit of time for Jaeyoon to figure out why he was naked with an arm around him. He rolled over and took in the sight of Youngbin sleeping beside him. The man looked so angelic in the light of the early morning sun, the corners of his mouth curved up in a slight smile and his eyes fluttering beneath their closed lids in a dream. Jaeyoon watched Youngbin lovingly, matching his breathing to the rise and fall of his chest, recalling the emotions of the previous night all over again.

He never could have imagined the sense of completion, of wholeness, that being with Youngbin had elicited. He felt like a new person, a better person, as if he had only been a shadow of what he was meant to be. He really hoped that it had been as good for Youngbin as it had for him. He didn’t think he could bear it if the man rejected him now.

He felt his anxiety start to climb, and he closed his eyes to focus on his breathing. The scent of coffee wafted through the air and woke up his stomach. Suddenly realizing how hungry he was and that the coffee must mean Ahrin was home, he slipped out of bed, got dressed, and made his way out to the kitchen.

Ahrin smiled up at him from her coffee. “I was hoping I’d get to see you before I went to bed,” she said. “I take it the guest bedroom is free?”

Jaeyoon blushed and nodded. “I guess I should have taken him there,” he said sheepishly.

Ahrin threw her arms around him. “I’m so proud of you,” she whispered.

Tears began to well up in his eyes, and he let out a sob.

“What’s the matter?” Ahrin tried wiping his tears away, “Is something wrong?”

“I’m just so happy. I don’t know how I’m supposed to be okay with leaving him now.”

Ahrin rubbed his back silently, letting the emotions pour out. “We can always try the chemo again,” she reminded him. “It’s not too late.”

Jaeyoon felt nauseous at the mention of the treatment. That had been one of the worst experiences of his life. The oncologist and neurologist had both agreed that there was a slight possibility it might delay progression a few months, but he couldn’t bear the thought of having to suffer through the effects of the treatment the entire time for such a small result. “I can’t go through that again. That’s no way to live.”

“Okay,” Ahrin raised up on tip toes to give him a kiss, “as long as you’re sure.”

“I’m sure,” he buried his face in her freshly washed hair. “I love you Rinn, you know that, right? I never could have made it without you.”

Ahrin placed a hand on his chest and looked up at him. “I know, honey. This heart has a capacity for so much love. I don’t worry about it running out.”

“Are you hungry?” Jaeyoon asked, “I can fix some breakfast for you too.” He made his way to the stove and started pulling pots and pans from the cupboards.

“I’m good,” Ahrin smiled. “I picked up a bite to eat on the way home from work. What are you gonna make for your boyfriend?”

“Probably everything. I’m starving.” Jaeyoon stopped emptying the refrigerator for a moment, “but I don’t know about calling him my boyfriend. I can’t explain it, but somehow it sounds cheap.”

“That’s not a problem,” Youngbin appeared shirtless in the doorway, “I’m actually very cheap.” He joined Jaeyoon in the kitchen, wrapped his arms around his waist from behind and kissed his neck.

“Okay,” Ahrin dropped her mug in the sink, “that’s my cue to go to bed.”

Jaeyoon tried really hard to make a nice breakfast, but Youngbin’s distractions and interference became too prohibitive, so he had to settle for a basic stew and some shoddily-made rolled omelets.

They quickly fell into a new routine. Ahrin finally gave Jaeyoon permission to return to the gym so long as Youngbin was there to spot him. It felt good to regain some modicum of control over his body after so long. However, he wasn’t used to not being able to rely on everything to work properly, and Youngbin saved him from several close calls when his hand would suddenly go numb or he would stumble.

“I guess it’s time for crunches now,” he smiled ruefully up at Youngbin from where he had swept him off the treadmill when his leg gave out.

“Ahrin would skin you alive, if she saw half of the things you do here,” Youngbin scolded him gently.

“Good thing you aren’t gonna tell her then. I don’t think you’d like me without skin,” Jaeyoon laughed. “Come on, hold my feet, hyung.”

He eventually got to where he could recognize the little hints his body was trying to send him to stop pushing so hard. At those times, Jaeyoon took delight in playing personal trainer to Youngbin, teaching him how to use the gym equipment properly and what stretches to do before each type of exercise.

Youngbin in turn made it his personal responsibility to make a bucket list for them to work through together. Every day Jaeyoon would step out of the school building when classes ended to find Youngbin waiting by his car to whisk him off on another adventure. They had gone paragliding, tried different restaurants, picnicked in a hot air balloon, and explored countless parts of the surrounding countryside.

Then they would return to a quiet evening at home where Jaeyoon would rest his head on Ahrin’s lap to serenade his unborn daughter. The sentimentality of the scene prompted Youngbin to procure studio time for Jaeyoon to make an actual record of those songs to preserve them for her.

Months passed, and Jaeyoon’s symptoms grew worse. Every morning he woke up to a splitting headache, sometimes bad enough to make him vomit from the pain. Youngbin would hold him through his distress, trying to comfort him with his presence. He was having trouble remembering things, and would take copious notes throughout the day, but he eventually had to turn in his resignation at the school, because he couldn’t keep up. Having to give up teaching hurt the most. More than the headaches or the fact that he had to use a cane more often than not, the loss of his job felt like a point of no return.

It was clear to everyone that Jaeyoon was starting to feel his mortality. He spent more of his time observing life and less of it on the circuitous way of speaking that had always been his habit. Rambling stories made way for lingering touches and studying gazes. The intimate moments he shared with Youngbin became more desperate and full of longing. It affected Youngbin more than he could imagine, but he couldn’t let Jaeyoon see, so he often found himself crying on Inseong’s shoulder.

Youngbin came to the harsh reality that he couldn’t ignore his diminishing savings, and, at Jaeyoon’s suggestion, made a connection with J.Don and joined in the arts school he was starting. He hadn’t realized how much he missed interacting with students, sharing his knowledge of dance and rap. It was a great set-up that he would have absolutely loved, if it didn’t keep him away from Jaeyoon for several hours a day. He took off for Ahrin’s delivery date to keep Jaeyoon company in the waiting room.

“Hyung?” Jaeyoon broke the silence as they waited. “I don’t want you to feel obligated or anything, but would you check on them every once in a while? Make sure they’re doing okay?” he rubbed Youngbin’s hand nervously. “I’m sure my parents will help, but we’re so far away from them.”

“Come on, love,” Youngbin pulled him into his arms, “Your family is my family.”

The joy on Jaeyoon’s face when he held his daughter for the first time was something Youngbin knew he’d never forget. He filled his phone storage with pictures.

“Let’s have another one,” Jaeyoon suggested, unable to tear his eyes from his child’s face.

“Sure,” Ahrin laughed, “give me a few days to recover first though.”

Ahrin had no qualms in asking Youngbin to be Ahyoon’s godfather, and he knew he’d do anything for Jaeyoon’s two girls.

It must have been seventeen years since Youngbin last stepped foot in a church. The priest who christened Ahyoon greeted him warmly.

“I hoped I’d get to meet you someday,” Father Marcellinus said, giving Youngbin a surprise hug. “You can call me Seokwoo. Any friend of Jaeyoon’s is a friend of mine, and you will always be welcome here.”

Youngbin sort of doubted that, but when Seokwoo came over for lunch and didn’t bat an eye at his and Jaeyoon’s PDA, he wondered if maybe things were different from when he was a child. Or maybe it was just Seokwoo. He still hurt from the things that he’d experienced when he was young, but perhaps he should give Seokwoo the benefit of the doubt.

Jaeyoon threw himself wholeheartedly into his new role as a father, and for about a month, it seemed as if the new purpose slowed down the progression of his tumor. However, it was just a matter of spirit over body, and, when his body eventually caught up to him, he began having seizures again. With each episode, Jaeyoon grew more and more fatigued, sleeping longer and appearing more confused when he was awake.

Youngbin found that the persisting trauma of the first seizure made it impossible to help Jaeyoon through subsequent episodes without experiencing significant personal distress, but he did the best he could to push through those feelings for Jaeyoon’s sake. When Ahrin came home from work to find Youngbin sobbing in the closet after a particularly bad seizure, she made arrangements to admit Jaeyoon to the palliative care unit at the hospital.

It was difficult to have to admit that it was necessary, but the nurses were able to be much more attentive to Jaeyoon’s needs. Youngbin could still see him as much as he wanted, and he or Ahrin often brought Ahyoon to visit her father, much to the delight of every patient and staff member on the unit. There was no way to anticipate what days Jaeyoon would be alert and acting like his normal self, but Youngbin made sure to go straight to his side every day after work, sleeping on the couch beside him every night.

He got the call in the middle of class. Jaeyoon was not coming out of his seizure despite everything that had worked in the past. He ran out of the studio barely noticing the pouring rain around him. The typhoon seemed appropriate for the moment. His heart raced, as he sped down the road to the hospital, hoping to make it before it was too late to say goodbye. The car slipped. Youngbin panicked, trying to regain control. Time slowed down as the car spun around and around. He braced for the impact. A bright light. Severe pain exploded in his abdomen and he felt dizzy, barely aware of anything.

“Hyung.”

Youngbin realized that the pain was dissipating and all he could feel now were the arms around him. He turned to look at Jaeyoon’s smiling face.

“It’s okay, hyung. Let me take care of you now,” Jaeyoon whispered in his ear.

Tears spilled from Youngbin’s eyes, and he let himself relax into his lover’s arms, sinking into the darkness.


	18. Epilogue

“Are you gonna be okay?” Inseong asked for the hundredth time that morning. He picked some lint off of the black suit. “I can come with you, if you’d like.”

“That’s alright,” Youngbin answered quietly, “I’ll get through it like I have every other day this year.”

He had been so upset to wake up in the hospital room after the accident. He thought for sure he was going to die in that moment, but fate had decided otherwise. It took him a long time to accept reality and stop blaming the universe for keeping him from joining Jaeyoon in the next life.

Really, the only thing that kept him from continuing in that anger was Ahrin and Ahyoon. He had made that promise to Jaeyoon to watch out for them. That was why he had been given a second chance, why Jaeyoon was keeping him alive now. He placed a hand over the scar on his abdomen, willing himself to feel the piece of Jaeyoon that had been gifted to him. His liver and spleen had ruptured in the accident, and everyone said it was a miracle that he didn’t die from massive blood loss at the scene. He didn’t want to believe in miracles, not if it kept him from his beloved. But the look on Ahrin’s face when she visited him in the hospital room, full of sorrow, but somehow at peace, as she told him Jaeyoon’s last words, _Save him_.

“I can’t explain it,” she had said that day, holding his hand as she sat by his bed. “I had no idea what he meant, but it was the most lucid he’d been all day. Then my pager went off, calling me to the trauma bay. It shouldn’t have been on. I didn’t even know I had it with me. I called the ER to tell them I was off duty, but instead I found myself agreeing to go down. I just felt compelled to help, and when I saw it was you, it all made sense.” 

Youngbin didn’t know what he thought about her story. She was convinced that God had intervened to save him, and he was willing to let her believe whatever she needed to deal with the grief. All he knew at the time was that he missed his chance to go with Jaeyoon.

Seokwoo came to talk to him, not about God, but about life. Youngbin wasn’t sure why he came to see him in the hospital, but he appreciated the companionship, and little by little, he started to realize that there was more life for him to live. There were his dance students, eager to learn from his experience. There was Inseong, always ready to share chicken and beer and whatever stories they needed to unload from the day. There was a little chubby-cheeked girl who would hug his legs and call him ‘Uncle Bin’ with a big smile and sparkling eyes, begging to be picked up. And then there was Ahrin, now carrying Jaeyoon’s second child, who saw her husband whenever she looked at him and would do anything to keep her family together. A family that now included him.


End file.
